Have you ever wondered why the lives of others seem so much more inspiring, passionate and exciting?
They travel, experience adventures, tell the craziest stories, and meet the most interesting people.
How do they manage to live this incredible life while you sit at home and surf through the web…
What is the secret of these people?
Once you get it, you can always take your life to the next level, no matter where you are or what you do.
This article is for all those who are tired of leading an average life.
You will learn:
- Why most people do not want to improve their lives at all
- Why you have an old-fashioned brain that needs an update
- The #1 habit of the most successful people
- 10 Simple and partly free things that put your life in the right direction
Why we don’t take control of our lives
We’re good at not doing things we know would serve us.
Most people are true masters at it.
- They are on a diet, but catch themselves eating the second pizza this week
- They sign a fitness contract for a whole year, and two months later they forget what a dumbbell looks like
- They set themselves a financial goal, but play Candy Crush instead of pursuing it
- They want to travel to New Zealand but never book a flight
Why are we acting like this?
Tony Robbins once said:
How much could your life improve if you just grabbed it by the balls, and went through the things you know will help you?
How much more money could you make? How much better would you look in the mirror? How many more women would you meet?
What the hell’s stopping us?
The answer is: our brain.
It almost seems as if it wants us to be anti-social, get a beer belly and go broke.
But in fact, it only wants to protect us.
If you have ever studied psychology, you have probably heard of instincts.
These are behaviors that are innate to a living being, and therefore do not need to be learned.
Many of these instincts used to be essential for survival, but today they can gnaw at our happiness, especially because they are not up-to-date.
- In times when there were giant cave bears and sabretooths just waiting to devour you with skin and hair, it made sense to be extremely economical with energy – you could soon need it to Usain Bolt yourself into safety.
- When winter approaches, it is helpful to build up body fat. Fat cells are basically contained energy for later use. This is very useful for times when there is less food.
- If you live in a tribe with 50 people, it was advisable (unless you were the alpha male!) to hide your sexuality. You would have risked being sliced up with a sharp stone by a jealous admirer. Sexy cave woman… nice! Seeing your intestines scattered in the cave, while your eyes get heavier and heavier… not so nice!
These evolutionary instincts can sabotage you for 3 reasons:
- They are deeply rooted in you on a neurological and emotional level
- They are in your SUBCONSCIOUSNESS
- They have a stronger influence on your behavior than your rational decision to eat zucchini and chicken, go to the gym or talk to that girl you like
As you can see, it is not even your fault that you cannot make your life more epic. There is simply a problem with your software.
The computer in your head is in need of an update.
This blog post is your patch.
A fulfilled life through irrationality
I still remember the moment when I was about to approach a woman for the first time in my life.
My brain immediately gave me 1000 reasons why it is absolutely impossible to walk up to this girl and say “Hi”.
“She doesn’t look open for a conversation.”
“She looks quite young. Who knows if she’s 18 yet?”
“You could make a fool of yourself in front of everyone.”
“You don’t have much time anyway.”
I listened to my thoughts and went home, disappointed with myself.
For me personally, there is no shittier feeling than regret.
When I want to do something, but don’t do it, because I am bitching out, I bite myself in the ass for days.
What should I have done that day?
Right. I shouldn’t have listened to my thoughts.
There is a lesson to be learned.
Think back to the craziest and most memorable things you’ve ever experienced or done…
Do you have any in mind?
Then answer one question:
Did they arise from a rational decision or rather from spontaneity and a “fuck it” mentality?
If you want to lead an epic, successful life, you need to make sure that your mind and body are constantly challenged with something new.
The more often you leave your apartment to explore AND TEST all the possibilities that life offers, the more often you teach your outdated brain that it is not only okay to leave the comfort zone, but incredibly worthwhile!
I’m not telling you to skip school or classes, ignore all responsibilities and abuse drugs. Please, don’t be a fool…
Just make small, irrational moments part of your everyday life.
- Cliff jumping
- A spontaneous weekend trip
- A game of strip poker with friends
- Creating a funny YouTube video
- Calling a random number to tell a joke
Irrationality can sweeten your life and teach your body not to constantly listen to your stupid, inhibiting thoughts.
No more excuses!
10 things that improve the quality of your life
You do not have to flip your everyday life upside down to improve your life.
Some things are amazingly simple, free of charge and yet have a bombastic effect that puts your life in the right direction.
Leeeet’s get ready to rumbleeeeeee…
#1: Improve you life through socializing
Maybe you already are social, but if you are like most people, it could use a little boost.
Even if it doesn’t seem like it sometimes, human beings have a strong need for social contact.
Of course, you feel good, when you have a lot of women around you. 😉
In a scientific paper 148 studies were analyzed to learn more about the influence of friendships on health. The researcher’ conclusion was that people who have many social circles are generally much healthier.
Which brings us straight to the next point:
#2: Health = Life
If you’re thinking “Fuck health, I don’t care about that in my life”, then hold on for a moment, M’lord.
We do not live to be healthy, but health and happiness usually go hand in hand.
This study shows that happy people are healthier.
Since this is a bi-directional relationship, the whole thing also works the other way around: healthy people are happier.
If you are less sick, you are also more productive. If you are more productive, you can earn more money.
Solid health helps you to get into a positive spiral that constantly takes your life to new heights.
Here are 5 scientifically proven ways to improve your health:
- Drink more water: Most people concentrate on 2 liters a day, but that is way too vague. How much you have to drink depends on your gender, how much you exercise and what type of food you eat. A better rule of thumb is: If your pee is not colorless, drink a large glass of water immediately.
- Take walks in nature: they have been proven to help against depression and obesity.
- Eat your fucking vegetables: If there is a constant lack of certain micronutrients, you need not be surprised if you get sick all the time.
- Stop smoking: That would be ideal. But if you can manage to inhale fewer cigarettes a week, that is already great. But I suggest you to simply be rigorous and stop it all together.
- Reduce stress: Stress is one of the biggest risk factors for our health. You will learn more about my favorite method to get rid of stress later!
#3: Start the day like a winner
I used to be the biggest morning grouch the world has ever seen. There was absolutely nothing I detested more than getting up in the morning. Luckily, I was also too tired to kill myself.
All day long I suffered from constant fatigue. My productivity was sufficient, but far from where I wanted it to be.
One of the things that changed my life positively was waking up the right way.
The bestselling author Tim Ferris likes to say:
Pressing the snooze button three times, leads to a delayed start of the day. Failing in the morning sets a bad rhythm for the rest of your day.
Here are 5 methods to win the morning:
- Always get up at the same time: Your body will adjust and make it easier and easier for you to get out of bed.
- No snoozing! Get up with the first ring of the alarm clock. I know it sometimes seems impossible, but you feel much better when you do it. No count down, no snooze, just get up no matter what. Placing your alarm clock out of arm’s reach is a good idea.
- Morning ritual: Routines make your life easier. You don’t have to think about what to do in the morning, you just execute. Put together a morning ritual that you will follow as closely as possible. I start mine with simple yoga stretches, meditation, journaling and a healthy breakfast.
- Quality > Quantity: The duration of your sleep is less important than the quality. While you should still allow enough time for sleep, you should also make the necessary arrangements to ensure that it will be a restful sleep. A darkened, noiseless and cool (between 15 and 18 degrees) room can help you sleep like a baby.
#4: Save money
I don’t think I have to explain how having some spare money can improve your life.
You can either use it to pay off debts, invest money in something or spend it on the things that make you happy.
Here are three methods to have more money:
- Try minimalism: Ask yourself before every purchase whether you really need that object and whether it adds value to your life. If the answer is “no,” then put that bloody thing back on the shelf. Who are we actually trying to impress?
- Pay cash: Of course, the credit card also has its advantages. The danger is that you quickly lose the feeling of how much money you have already spent this month.
- Sell things you don’t need: I am sure you have books you are not going to read a second time. And I know a book shelf is kind of a cool thing to have. But if you know for a fact that you won’t read a book a second time, just sell it. By doing that, you can make another person wiser and smarter and yourself a bit richer.
#5: Do sports
A thousand people have told you a thousand times that working out is good for you. Perhaps they are right…
In my (accurate) opinion, the benefits of regular exercise are totally underestimated.
An athletic body is not only useful for looking good naked.
Here are 5 reasons why you should start working out today:
- Improved brain performance: Studies have shown that exercise can increase your memory and your capacity to learn quicker
- Better posture: I have often talked about how important posture is for basically everything. Better posture = more charisma = more influence = more confidence = more punani.
- Self-esteem: It’s not just about improving your appearance. Regular exercise ensures that endorphins are released in your body. You get a feeling of success as if you had just climbed Mount Everest. The social aspect, especially in team sports, should not be underestimated either.
- Better sex: Studies have shown that exercise can increase your desire for sex and prevent erection problems.
- Less frequently ill: Your immune system gets stronger as well.
#6: Freeze to death
What I mean:
I have benefited greatly from cold showers. I knew that they were good for my immune system, but that was not the reason why I decided to expose myself to “hello micropenis” levels of temperature.
I did it for the mind.
And I was far from wrong in thinking that cold showers could help me.
Cold showers increase your willpower and emotional resilience.
This study shows that cold water acts as an oxidative stressor on your nervous system. Your body adapts over time and you become a relaxed, cool, badass dude.
I NEVER FELT LIKE DOING IT. But I just knew how much better I would feel afterward. So I developed a “fuck it!” mentality and just went for it.
This also reduced the approach anxiety I used to have with women, because it’s exactly the same situation:
You don’t want to do it, then say “fuck it” and simply do it anyway.
#7: Improve other’s lives
By that I don’t mean that you should put on white gloves, and bend down to clean the shoes of someone who doesn’t respect you.
But there is something that makes yourself and other happy:
The scientifically-proven benefits you can derive from giving value are enormous:
- Release of Endorphins, those thingies in your body that make you feel good
- Improved physical health
- Stress relief
- How can I help others?
- In what ways do I bring value into the lives of others?
- Can I do something most people can’t?
- Do I have something that others do not?
Your ultimate goal should be to give more than you take. Sounds a little woo-woo and reminds of the concept of karma, I know.
Don’t worry, you won’t be reincarnated as a rat if you don’t give value (as far as I can tell), but it is a logical consequence that others will want to spend time with you if you give more than you take.
- Be the one who goes out with your buddy when he’s heartbroken
- Be the person who helps, when a friend is moving
- Take trampers with you, when you are on the road
- Be the wingman that keeps the overweight girlfriend busy so that your buddy can talk to the girl he like (I do that all the time haha)
- Be the man to compliment your colleague on doing a great job
#8: Read books
I think it’s arrogant not to read books.
There are people out there who have made it their life’s work to carefully write down the knowledge, some of which has been collected over centuries…
And then there are actually people who claim that they don’t need books… WTF!
I refer to these people as octopuses.
And this is by no means meant as an insult. Ok, maybe just a little…
Let me explain.
Octopuses are fascinating creatures! They are characterized by a highly developed nervous system, which makes them extremely adaptive and intelligent.
The problem with the octopus, however, is that it reproduces only once and dies a few weeks after reproduction. It is also a loner.
Thus the rational development of the octopus is extremely limited. Instead of learning from each other, each octopus has to make the same mistakes as every other octopus…
Many people behave that way too. They make mistakes that 1000 others have made before them, and they have actually written books about how to avoid these mistakes!
Sharpen your mind. Don’t be an octopus.
For his book “Tribe of Mentors” Tim Ferriss interviewed 140 World Class Performers from various fields.
He claims that 90% of the most successful people meditate – whether it be in tennis, cryptocurrency or cooking.
I’m aware that many have strange ideas about it.
Many people immediately picture a Chinese monk with a long, white beard, sitting cross-legged on a mountain for decades, absorbing the sunlight.
Or they think of a yoga trainer dressed in white, posing for women’s magazines.
Yet meditation is very simple, practical and anything but Woo-Woo.
An eight-week study has found that meditation can change your brain positively.
Although it is more associated with relaxation and inner peace, it can actually improve the synaptic structure of your brain, and increase gray matter.
This brings cognitive and psychological benefits that can fundamentally change your life for the better.
Start meditating today. This need not take an hour. 10 minutes every morning are quite sufficient.
#10: Be a vagabond
If I could give just one piece of advice to people who want to know how to live a more exciting life, then it would be:
Travel as much as you can.
And I’m not talking about the typical holiday with a strict timetable.
No, I am talking about an adventure.
Travel somewhere you have never been before, with an open timetable and the will to discover new places and meet interesting people.
Over the winter of 2015, for example, I traveled to Malaysia. I didn’t have a plan and didn’t book any accommodation before.
After a few days, I spontaneously decided to take a speed ferry to Langkawi Island. I rented a scooter and explored the island.
I drove on and on until I had no idea where I was…
I started talking to an Australian dude I met in a local restaurant. He told me that I was just 100 meters away from a waterfall paradise that I should definitely visit.
He was right.
One waterfall after the other and the rocks were smoothly polished by nature so that you could slide down without danger. They also formed countless natural pools in which you could cool down like a king.
I took a picture with my Go-Pro…
I spent hours sliding from pool to pool. Good times!
5 reasons why you should travel:
- You appreciate your home more: How often do you hear people nagging about things you would be happy about in another country? By traveling you remain humble and grateful.
- You gain more wisdom: Often you become aware of how little you actually know about the world. I noticed that racist and intolerant people rarely leave their country. Travel ensures that you remain open-minded and curious.
- You’ll see how easy it is to make friends: When you travel, you have a much more open mindset. This is also the case with other people. Many women are more open to flirting and one-night-stands simply because they are in “holiday mode”. This natural way to meet new people can be used in your own city as well.
- You got stories to tell: If you’ve ever wondered what to talk about with women on a date, you may be experiencing too little. When you travel, so many things happen that are not only worth telling, but are captivating when you wrap them up in a story.
- You get to know yourself: Since you leave behind all the things that define you – be it friends, family, career etc., you are forced to discover yourself.
What else are you going to change today?
The most important quality to fundamentally improve your life is willpower.
Therefore, I challenge you to implement one of these points today.
I know you hate homework, but it comes from a place of empathy and from knowing that 95% of people are too comfortable to take their lives to the next level.
Let’s see what group you belong to.
Dan de Ram