‘Am I Unattractive?’ + 10 Other Biggest Self-Sabotaging Turnoffs

am i unattractive

In this blogpost I give you:

  • 10 Answers to you question ‘Am I Unattractive?’
  • How you can still seduce any women even if you have unattractive looks
  • How unattractive behavior is the biggest turnoff for women
  • Why unattractiveness is a mindfuck in your brain
  • More insights about what’s unattractive actually means…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

Well, well, well…

Look who’s here.

You must be a creative genius, amigo.

Because unlike most men, who tend to look at what women find ATTRACTIVE in men, you seem to do the opposite.

And I can certainly respect that.

Because if you are just looking for what you should work on, you may miss out on all the unattractive qualities that are still sabotaging your success and are in your system.

What do I mean by that?

Maybe you are already a true king at approaching women confidently.

But somehow your interactions never result in numbers, dates, make-outs or sex.

The reason for this can be due to something (perhaps even completely banal for you) that you’re doing – but which you aren’t aware of yet…

Little things that ruin your potential to attract – any high-quality woman.

And that’s exactly why in this article I show you the 10 most fatal female turnoffs (and give you crystal-clear tips on how to handle them effortlessly). You can see the turnoffs I mention also as a kind of “are you attractive quiz”.

And without wasting valuable time… let’s jump right into it!

Turnoff #1: ‘Error 404’

A few months ago, I coached a guy who actually did everything right. He was charming, charismatic, his posture was perfect and he knew exactly how to flirt with women.

Nevertheless, he was rejected non-stop. And often within the first 2 seconds after he had approached a lady.


>> How To Develop The 7 Masculine Traits Women Find Attractive.

Because he thought that looks don’t matter when it comes to seduction.

He wore a washed-out, much too chunky jeans, an inconspicuous sweater that was worn out at the sleeves and what he called his beard resembled a cat with hair loss.

This gentleman sabotaged himself significantly by his ‘style’.

He was convinced that his level of unattractiveness is out of this world, that he has an unattractive face and literally screamed ‘I feel unattractive and don’t deserve to look nice!’.


Not very attractive, huh.

So, looks do play a role when it comes to seduction.

The good thing is that you can easily change most things about yourself.

Be it through a shopping tour through ZARA or a visit at the barbershop.


You don’t know anything fashion and have no clue, where to start?

Don’t worry.

I wrote you this article exactly for this purpose:

>> 10 Tips – Dress to Impress for Men (Ladies LOVE This)

Turnoff #2: You resemble Oscar the Grouch

If there is a turnoff, which inspires women to jump out of the next window, even if they were kneeling a few seconds in front of you with their mouth open, it’s…

…bad hygiene.


If you think it’s a brilliant idea to brush your teeth irregularly, wash your hair once a week, and feel like showering is overrated… then you fully deserve women avoiding physical contact with you.

After all, it’s damn easy to make personal hygiene your b!tch.

So brush your teeth every day, floss and rinse your mouth regularly (especially before dates), take a shower, use deodorant for hell’s sake and have chewing gum for the road.

Et voilà – your hygiene won’t ruin any more romantic kissing moments.

As easy as that.

Turnoff #3: You swallow your voice

This may surprise you, but:

Even though some women seem to love to hear themselves speak in Vicky Pollard manner, it doesn’t mean that they want you to talk in a similar tone:

Women are instinctively more attracted to men who have a masculine voice.

And by that, I mean this:

  • A low pitch
  • Speaking loud and clear
  • Talking in controlled, comfortable speed

You’re still skeptical that you can change your voice to a powerful wingman?

Then watch this video. This amigo has gone from a life on the streets to a stately life with the help of his voice:

If you just heard his voice, you’d probably think he was a boss. And that’s how women think. The way he speaks makes him appear like a dominant, masculine man.

And that’s the power of your voice.

Depending on how you use it, women associate attractive or rather unattractive qualities with it.

>> Dating Rules for Men: The Ultimate 2020 Guide.

Turnoff #4: You are competing with Woody Woodpecker

Imagine an extremely voluptuous woman, who has lost the genetic lottery, approaching you in the club.

As you speak politely to her and do your best not to look at her beard, you pray that one of your friends will come and save you…

And at that very moment she bends her back so that she can stretch her head far forward towards your ear to whisper something to you. You feel the hairs of her beard caressing your ears…

It doesn’t take long until you instinctively take a step back to increase distance.

What you have just witnessed, I christen with love…

…the woodpecker.

But what exactly makes this posture so unattractive?

  1. It’s intimidating: Entering the ‘personal space’ of a person for whom you are still a stranger only intimidates him/her (especially if they are physically inferior to you). If women often reject you in clubs, in 7/10 cases this is the reason for it
  2. You seem desperate: The fact that you put yourself in an uncomfortable position just so that she can hear you better sub-communicates that she is more important to you than your own well-being.

“Yes, but Dan…. In some clubs it’s just way too loud and you have to get close to her.”


That’s why you want to inspire her to get closer to you.


Learn it here.

Turnoff #6: You look away

Bro, do yourself and her a favor and look into her pretty eyes.

Why should she be able to see a brave man in you if you don’t even dare to make eye contact with her? How do you think she perceives you when you are constantly looking at the floor instead of relaxed into her gazers?

That’s right.

She can’t really take you seriously.

In addition, without eye contact simply NO sexual tension can arise.

In no parallel universe.

No sexual tension = Platonic conversation = Friendzone.



So you better learn how to charm her in a pleasant way with your gaze:

>> Sexual Attraction – 15 Things She Wants You to Know, But Will Never Tell You

Turnoff #7: You don’t touch her

One more thing:

How the f*ck can you expect a woman to kiss you (or do more) when you haven’t even touched her?

It’s your responsibility to inspire women and eliminate platonic conversations.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to force dozens of uncontrolled touches your next dates at every opportunity.


Rather that you touch her in baby steps while you actively watch how she reacts.

By the way, you can find out exactly how you manage that here:

>> 9 Most Authentic Seduction Techniques to Win Over Your Woman

Turnoff #8: You do anything just to please her

Every attractive woman has a few guys around her who would give their lives to win her over.

Guys who…

  • Regularly take her out fancymancy
  • Shower her with gifts
  • Listen to all her problems at any time (although they aren’t really interested hearing them)
  • Hide their true opinions and adapt them to their lady, hoping they will score points by ‘more similarities’ with her
  • Lose their own boundaries for her

She calls them ‘nice friends.’ But the truth is that most of the time it’s just a bunch of desperate men pretending to be polite in hope they will magically end up in her bed, because they just don’t know how to ‘seduce’ her.

Breaking news:

Money, pretending to be sweet and gifts don’t motivate quality women to find you attractive.


Of course, you can give your flame sweet presents – however, they have to be justified.

If you just think she’s pretty, but she doesn’t even care about you, then she doesn’t deserve your attention either.

Sounds easy, right? That because, it is.

Turnoff #9: You Ted-Mosbied her

Many men with ‘negligible’ experience tend to imitate Ted Mosby (from How I Met Your Mother).

Instead of building the relationship with their lady step by step, they dedicate the rashest declaration of love to her as soon as she doesn’t run away from them…

>> 12 Subtle ways to Impress a Woman and Get Her Full Attention.

The reaction of their beloved?

They run away.


After all, you hardly know her.

And if you’re completely honest with yourself, you don’t ‘love’ a woman after a short time.

Maybe you got caught up in the idea of a potentially rosy future…

… or in love with the challenge of winning her for you (for example, if she seems unattainable).

But it has nothing to do with sincere love.

That doesn’t mean you should pretend to dislike her. Because this is unauthentic and therefore unattractive.

So hold your horses and control your emotions, cowboy.

(By the way, at the end of this article I will tell you exactly how you can do this in practical steps, so keep your attention right here.)

Turnoff #10: You take NO responsibility

Him: *sees a woman who makes him nervous but is too pretty to just let her walk down the street*

She: *struts on *

He: * looks around nervously and sees her whizzing past him*

She: *continues walking and stops at a stoplight 200 yards down the road*

He: *after he followed her for 2 minutes, he overcomes his doubts and approaches her*

“He-heyyy, you’re pretty”

…mumbling tones leave his mouth.

She: *look at him disgusted*

“No, thanks. Have no interest”

– Next scenario: –

“Hey, I’m glad we managed to meet up.”

“Me too.”

“Soooo, what are we doing today?”

Pooh. Honestly, I was hoping you had an idea… What are you in the mood for?”

…Aaaand she’s gone!

Well, perhaps the female reactions from my examples are a liiiittle bit exaggerated…

Nevertheless, this doesn’t change the fact that the guys from both scenarios got exactly the response they deserved.


Because both compañeros fail to take responsibility.

Guy #1 chases his chosen one for minutes and is intimidated by his nervousness.

Guy #2 goes on a date without having a clue what he wants to do with his date.

Of course, you could say now:

“But Dan, in the end guy #1 approached her.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What a guy.

But how am I supposed to have respect for a guy who hides.

Because that’s what he did.

Instead of owning his nervousness and addressing it like this…

“Hey, listen. When I saw you, nervousness came up all over my body because you’re actually quite my type. I felt how it wanted to paralyze me. But I thought ‘f*ck it’. Why should I let it get in my way?… Hi, I’m XY”

… he revealed only a part of his thoughts – out of fear he might be judged for his true feelings.

Sorry, bro.

But this behavior is on the weak side.

Either you go to the pot and do your ‘business’ or leave it alone, if you do a mixture of both … then half of it will hit the floor…

And you, sir, just have witnessed this effect in both scenarios.

>>When You Fall in Love – 5 Ways to Win Her Heart.

So, learn to take responsibility for your actions.

  • Go out on dates and be totally present.
  • Speak shamelessly to women and express yourself without any hesitation.
  • Try to kiss her without batting an eyelid and stay calm if you get rejected…

Through half-heartedness, no one has ever achieved a better result than at best ‘mediocre’.

Let it seep into your synapses.

One thing to boost your attractiveness tenfold

“Yes, you’re right about all of this Dan. But somehow I always feel inner blockages when I want to go all the way. How do I overcome them?”

Gotcha’, bro.

It would be naive of me to expect you to overcome your self-sabotaging inner demons completely on your own after reading this article.

To help you along the way I have an extra for you.

This is exactly why I decided to create a free Transformation Kit for you.

Filled with my best advice so you always have flirty conversations (online and offline). And the way of the man. Step by step how you can give yourself a transformation towards the most attractive you.

A man for who women will queue up.

To get it simply click the link below.

So, don’t wait any longer and download your Transformation Kit now.

See you on the other side.

Your bro,
Dan de Ram

Stop awkward conversations
and painful rejections

My free Transformation Kit will make you irresistible to women.

  • 12 Opening Lines that Actually Work
  • 5 Date Generating Texting Tips (Plus Copy-Paste Lines for Tinder)
  • The Friendzone Escape-Room Trick
Yes, give me the Transformation Kit!

Related articles


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *