We have to talk about something serious, my friend…
Are you a wolf, or a lapdog?
Put differently, are you a true masculine man? Or do you have the looks of a man but the characteristics of a woman?
Now don’t get me wrong when I throw around words like being a man or a woman. But one thing is certain.
Masculinity is dying out. Or maybe worse: put to sleep.
In this article you will learn how to regain your inner man:
- How to become a man and what it REALLY means to be a man
- Why feminists HATE masculinity (for the wrong reasons)
- How to increase masculinity + why it is your DUTY to do so (Spoiler: Society needs it!)
- Why a beast slumbers within you and how you awaken it
- What YOUR task is as a man and how you fulfill it responsibly
- The best teachers to become a strong and competent man
- And much more tips on how to be more masculine…
By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?
You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
Look at this majestic animal:
You know what that is?
A maddafakkin wolf.
And this maddafakkin wolf once had a gigantic territory. He populated the entire Northern Hemisphere – from Mexico to North Africa, Arabia and India. In fact, it was once considered the most widespread mammal.
How are things today?
Today, the wolf either stayed true to his maddafakkin wolfhood, and is threatened by extinction. Or he had Sauron give him one of the nine rings of emasculation, and he mutated.
To a lapdog.
On the one hand, it’s very cute. But on the other hand, it’s a tragedy.
What happened to the majestic wolf?
Why can you only see lapdogs with that innocent, naive look on their faces?
Have they forgotten where they came from?
Masculine development: Is masculinity dying out?
In case you haven’t noticed:
The wolf served as my charming metaphor for masculinity.
I am aware that I dramatized it a bit. Yes, masculinity is in crisis. That much is certain.
But no, masculinity will not die out. Our society could not afford that. It is needed just as much as femininity is needed.
Yin and yang, bi*ches!
I have been working as a dating coach for almost a decade now. I have worked with thousands of men. Besides, I’ve walked the world with my eyes wide open.
So I can tell you what I’m observing on a regular basis:
Few men are connected to their authentic masculinity…
… and that is why they suffer.
Of course, I give different and specific dating tips, but if I had to greatly simplify the advice I give most men, it would look like this:
- “I dare not speak to her. ” > be a man
- “I don’t know what to say. ” > be a man
- “What’s the best way to end it?” > be a man
- “How do I avoid the Friend Zone?” > be a man
- “How do I get over her?” > be a man
Again, I’m oversimplifying. But this raises questions like:
What does it actually mean to be a man?
How to be masculine?
In this article you will find the answer to these questions as well as the wolf in you.
How to be manly? What it means to be a man
When you walk through the world as a man with eyes wide open, you notice that society is subtly pointing a condemning finger at masculinity.
The term “toxic masculinity” is used regularly.
Many act as if men alone are to blame for all the negative events in history.
There are more than a handful of movies or commercials that present masculinity as a gigantic problem (such as the Gillette commercial).
But don’t worry, it’s not so bad.
The shrill voices of extreme feminists who demonize masculinity are just so loud…
… that all the beautiful and sensible voices of the majority of women are barely audible.
And the majority of women yearn for your manhood.
If you knew how many women reach out to me saying that they love my noble job, or thanking me because their husband has become more masculine under my supervision, your eyes would roll out of your head.
Makes you wonder:
Well, actually, they don’t have anything against it.
The problem is that they do not understand what masculinity really is.
They think masculinity means:
- Beating up old ladies
- Brushing your teeth with beer
- Burping each other in the face
But that’s not manly, that’s just pathetic…
(I am not completely innocent when it comes to the last two points… What can I say, at the end of the day, I’m only human.)
Masculinity is often confused with evil, the devil or Mordor.
But to be a real man means to every man with dignity:
- Being able to stay calm when everyone else panics
- Believing in yourself when others doubt you, but still welcome their doubting
- Being hated without having to hate back
- Wanting something unconditionally, and being patient at the same time
- Being able to tell the truth and deal with it
- Being able to serve a king without making yourself small
- Having values and integrity
- Being able to LEAD yourself and others
- Being able to own your feminine side without judging yourself
- Having the urge to created safe spaces for women
- Being decisive and yet open to the fact that you could be completely wrong
- Having demands on yourself and others
Do all this and you will be a real man.
From lapdog to wolf to become a real man
I get on the subway and I see in men’s faces exactly what I always see…
The naive Simba look:
Men with the royal Mufasa look are rare creatures:
He seems so much stronger and kinglier, don’t you think?
But what does that mean? That the men can’t control their facial muscles?
It means that they are not connected to their masculinity.
Maybe now you’re thinking something like:
You wouldn’t be wrong.
Even if it doesn’t seem that way, I actually have nothing against less masculine men.
But I wonder what would happen if things got really rough.
What if a woman gets hit on the subway? Would somebody get in the way?
What if the subway derails? Would the men be able to keep their cool and make the situation better instead of worse?
What if there’s a terrorist attack? Would they try to protect the women and children selflessly?
I know that this is very confrontational, but, in fact, I ask these questions myself as well.
I work on my manliness every day because I know that I could never forgive myself as a man if I did not do these things.
This calls for a…
I used to be one of the most unmanly teenagers.
Yeah, that little frog was me.
For reasons I can’t explain, my puberty thought:
Even at the age of 18 I still had a high-pitched voice, at most three hairs on my ball sack, and there was no trace of any other masculine features.
I was raised by my mother and sister. So I lacked a masculine role model. As you can imagine, this had a major impact on my love life.
Girls thought I was quite nice, but they could not even visualize doing something romantic or sexual with me.
So imagine an 18-year-old boy with a squeaky voice, a milky face and no female attention.
But it can always get worse. In addition, I was a victim of bullying.
What I learned about bullying the hard way:
It’s nothing personal.
Perpetrators never really had anything against me. They simply looked for the easiest target. Like hyenas attack the weakest antelope.
And in me, they had found their antelope…
I was beaten up on the way to driving school. It was not as brutal as in the movie “Fight Club”, but it was traumatizing nevertheless.
The worst thing for me was the fact that I had to show my “new” face to the entire school.
It was like an official “victim of bullying” stamp on my forehead.
When the girl I was in love with at the time saw me like this, I was ashamed.
I can safely say: those were the worst times of my life. And I almost accepted them as my fate. But something strong inside me came up and said:
So I did something that any 18-year-old would do in my place:
I worked on my masculinity.
7 high-impact ways to increase your masculinity
I have tried out many things and many of them have proven to be helpful.
But a lot of it was also a waste of time.
I will share the 7 things that have increased my masculinity the most, so that you do not have to waste your time. You’re welcome.
Tip #1: Discover the warrior within
Many men THINK they can fight.
But thinking is sometimes not enough. Only when you know for sure that you can fight, you will feel more like a man.
Call me old-fashioned or conservative or sexist or whatever…
But I am firmly convinced that as a man it is YOUR duty to protect family, women, children, innocents, friends and so on.
Let’s just assume that I’m always right.
I mean, it’s true, but let’s stay humble.
Isn’t it the most logical thing in the world that you feel more masculine, strong and confident .when you know that you can defend yourself against any average man?
You don’t have to be able to knock out Conor McGregor…
(Which would be very respectable)
… but if you want to increase your manhood, and have never at least thought about doing some form of martial arts, I wonder what the heck you are doing.
Fighting is a brutal teacher.
You will never forget the lessons it teaches you. It will not always be fun and games. On the contrary, it is anything but pleasant to leave every training session with new bruises.
But that, my friend, is EXACTLY the reason why martial arts is so good for your masculinity.
Tip #2: Discover the Bear Grylls within
It’s no wonder that men today don’t realize how tough they actually are – after all, they are never really tested.
One thing that has ALWAYS strengthened me in my self-confidence and my role as a man is to learn how to survive in the brutal nature.
Learning the noble art of survival is not a bad idea.
Attention: You don’t have to go to extremes here either.
Sleeping in a camel corpse is not necessary…
You’ll feel more manly as you learn:
- How to make a campfire
- How to make water drinkable
- How to build a shelter for a day
- Which mushrooms and herbs are eatable
- How to use a knife or an axe
Theoretical knowledge alone gives you a masculine feeling. But if you really want to know what you are made off, you go out and apply it.
Leave your smartphone, your chai latte and your favorite teddy bear at home, and spend one or more nights in nature.
You’ll come back a stronger man, guaranteed.
It may be that you never really need these survival skills because we live in a comfortable bubble in the west.
But that reminds me of a Chinese proverb.
One student said to his master:
The master replied:
Tip #3: Why men are not allowed to show emotion
I keep hearing:
Which has me thinking:
Have those who say such things ever opened their eyes? Men are totally allowed to show emotion. There are more emotional men than sand at the sea.
Is that a problem?
Not at all. No one’s judging them for it.
But I’m not sure that’s such a good thing.
Men must be able to control their emotions.
I am aware that this is a controversial statement. But it is the truth, and the truth will always be provocative.
When I was 18 years old, I expressed all my feelings – always and everywhere.
Both men and women thought I was homosexual.
At the time I thought it was unfair, but later I understood what the problem was:
It’s not manly to be overly emotional.
Have I been demonizing emotions since then?
Certainly not. I love emotion.
No, I LIVE for emotion.
I want to be the opposite of a robot. I want to FEEL things.
But feeling emotions within you does not mean that you have to let them out in an absolutely uncontrolled way.
For men, there is a limit that can be exceeded.
Take a look at this video, for example:
You might be thinking now:
No, that’s not “fine”.
This man is crying because the logo of a gigantic multi-billion dollar company fades in.
Are you really trying to tell me that’s “fine”? How much does that say about his inner strength as a man?
That it does not exist.
I’m afraid that he…
- Is useless when women, children or other men need to be protected.
- Collapses when the brutality of life crashes down on him.
- Dies a miserable death, when you put him into nature all by himself.
But maybe I’m being mean to that man for no reason…
Maybe he has some mystical Jedi powers I don’t know about.
If you want to strengthen your masculinity, you should be able to detach emotionally.
Tip #4: Discover the monster within
If you knew what a monster is lurking inside you, you’d be afraid of yourself.
I must admit:
Just because I don’t think much of modern feminism, it doesn’t mean that I disagree with everything.
The feminists are right on this point:
Men can actually be dangerous.
There is no doubt about it.
If you think that there is no side of you that is capable of doing the most immoral things, you are naive. History has already shown us how monstrous men (AND women by the way) can be.
Pretending that this side doesn’t exist in you is limiting.
It is much better to know this side well so that you can bring it under voluntary control.
Ask yourself, for example, what has to happen for you to kill somebody?
Be honest with yourself.
Not much, am I right?
I know it’s scary to explore that dark side. But actually, it’s one of the most important things you can do.
See what Friedrich Nietzsche had to say about this:
Many think it’s noble to be a harmless lapdog.
But there’s nothing noble about that.
It can do nothing… except for getting bullied, mistreated and sliced up into pieces.
Noble is the wolf that does not attack, even though it could.
The wolf that can successfully tame itself, but can still become a beast when it counts, is the wolf that is respected.
Tip #5: Discover the Iceman within
From Wim Hof, also known as “Iceman”, I learned one thing:
The cold is harsh but fair.
This makes the cold an excellent teacher.
I have experimented a lot with cold exposure. In winter, of course, this is easier. In summer, ice cubes and my bathtub had to do the job.
Maybe you’re wondering now:
The short answer:
When you go into the ice bath, and whine or resist the cold, it feels like thousand knifes are stabbing you.
But if you stay calm and in control, it’s not that bad.
It’s even soothing.
But one weak thought and the cold immediately punishes you again by whipping, stabbing and torturing you.
So the cold has taught me mental strength like no other.
I like to be a little extreme. You don’t have to follow my lead. But just start by taking a cold shower and see what it does to you. Stay as calm as possible and let the cold strengthen your manliness.
Tip #6: Discover the Thomas Shelby within
I used to be a wanking slacker.
Did I feel like a very manly wanking slacker?
In fact, I don’t think that’s possible.
Women find Thomas Shelby, the main character from the series “The Peaky Blinders”, irresistibly sexy.
“Coincidentally”, he’s a real work beast.
A man who works hard usually has his shit together in life. To cling as a woman to a wanking slacker is not a smart strategy.
In Christianity, it is even assumed that men were created for this purpose:
Well, that doesn’t sound like fun…
But I got to say, since I’ve been working a lot, I feel much manlier.
Don’t take me as an example here either. I am in the process of bringing a little more balance into my life, because I probably work a little too much, which is not good either.
But the feeling of masculinity is there, and I also notice that señoritas find it sexy when they realize that I am constantly busy.
Rationally, they should think:
But instead, they think:
Does that mean you should always pull the “I’m busy…” card as some kind of tactic?
No, that would be embarrassing.
It means that you should ACTUALLY be busy – ideally with something meaningful.
Find your mission, work your ass off, and I guarantee: not only will you feel ultra-masculine, but you’ll also create something you are proud of when you lie on the deathbed one day…
Not a bad thing.
Tip #7: Discover the Samurai within
Discipline has strengthened my spirit.
I wake up at the same time every day – no matter how I feel. I don’t think I have to mention that this has been very useful for my life.
Many men have a negative association with discipline.
They think discipline restricts their freedom.
And if it is forced upon someone, it may indeed be the case.
But discipline can be your best friend.
I even wake up in the morning, when I went to a club or bar the night before.
One could now say that I am limiting myself.
Getting up early makes me more productive. This in turn gives me more free time and I can do what I want to do without having to think about work.
I understand that everyone is different.
There are artists who swear by the fact that discipline blocks their creativity. I doubt it’s true, but, hey…
Decide for yourself in which areas of life it would do you good to be more disciplined. Most of the time, we all know EXACTLY what these areas are.
Time to be a man
You now know how to strengthen your masculinity. And you also know that it means you have a lot of responsibility.
Fortunately, the universe thanks you when you carry that responsibility by giving you the most amazing women.
I am aware that, in this article, I have written little about how you can seduce (and keep) these women.
But don’t be sad.
Because I have compiled all of this and my best advice in a neat ‘little’ Transformation Kit. It gives you the steps to uncover your masculinity within. Plus, how to apply it and perhaps even seduce women with your new inner manliness.
Sounds pretty good if you ask me.
Or click the button below.
I see you on the other side.
Dan de Ram