How Psychologists Get Over a Broken Heart: 5 Tips to Heal and Love Life Again

how to get over a broken heart

I don’t want to write a dramatic introduction to this article.

Your present situation is dramatic enough…

Your heart is broken and a lot of questions weigh down your soul:

  • “Can I ever forget her?”
  • “Can I ever love again?”
  • “When will I be ready for a new girl?”
  • “Do I have to be the Lone Ranger now?”

It’s good that you ask yourself these questions.

But even better is that you’re looking for answers. Most men don’t do that and run like lemmings straight into their personal hell.

To avoid that, you will learn today:

  • 3 Tips on how to heal a broken and make love again
  • How to deal with the painful feelings of your past relationship
  • What advice to watch out for if you want to heal your broken heart fast
  • 5 signs that you are ready for a new love adventure and have overcome your broken heart disease
  • The most effective method to feel free again
  • And much more blessings for your broken heart…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

The 3 most common broken heart healing strategies that do NOT work

I don’t know why you suffer from a “broken heart syndrome” right now.

Maybe you had a relationship that ended badly.

Maybe she broke up with you.

Whatever the case, the fact is:

Your heart needs to recover.

Everyone knows that, but only a few people have an effective long-term strategy.

Here are the 3 most common strategies that will DEFINITELY fail:

  • Strategy #1: Some men rush into a new relationship as quickly as possible, because they miss the closeness and affection, and want to escape the pain. So they “fall in love” with a new woman, although they are still attached to another one.
  • Strategy #2: Others do exactly the opposite: they have no interest in interpersonal relationships for the time being, bury themselves in work and hobbies, and avoid social situations.
  • Strategy #3: Then there are men who tattoo “freedom” and “YOLO!” on their foreheads. They throw themselves into nightlife and fuck their half-dead souls out.

As a dating coach with years of experience, I can tell you exactly what works in the short-term, what works in the mid-term, and… what works in the long-term.

And I can promise you that these strategies can help you in the short term, but in the long run, they can even harm you!

What happens to deep pain, when you run away from it?

That’s right, it buries itself into your subconsciousness, and turns into a TRAUMA that sabotages your happiness without you even noticing it.

We all experience traumas. This is called LIFE.

As long as we deal with them, instead of suppressing them, everything is fine.

Even better:

They even make you stronger research shows.

5 Tips to get over a broken heart

Today, I’m going to show you a strategy that works LONG-TERM.

It’s not easy. But it’s effective.

Continue reading only when you are REALLY ready to overcome your painful condition…

Tip #1: Drown

Okay, you’re still here.

Maybe now you were hoping for a secret life hack or a magic pill to somehow get around the pain.

Sorry to disappoint you, brochacho.

The quickest way to relieve the pain after a breakup is to engage with it completely.

I’m not saying it’s easy. But I am saying it’s necessary.


The pain will come in waves.

And these waves will crush you like a tsunami.

You’ll feel like you’re drowning.

That’s okay.

Let it happen. Drown…

You’re gonna open your eyes again, think you’re dead, and realize everything’s okay.

The pain is gone.

But I got bad news for you, homie:

It’ll be back. And you know what you’ll do then?

You’ll drown in it again.

But you’ll get through it again.

Maybe there’ll be a third wave. But you’ll see that the waves will get weaker and weaker.

And you will get stronger.

Here are a few practical tips to help you drown (as crazy as it sounds):

  • Breathe deeply and slowly into the pain
  • Spend much time alone in nature
  • Write your pain off your soul
  • Don’t look for pity, don’t feel sorry for yourself, but allow yourself to feel the sorrow 100% (and cry if necessary)
  • Do sports. Train like a berserk. Your heart is broken, so let it beat as fast as it can. This will help you to “exhale” the pain, so to speak.
  • Avoid distractions like parties, alcohol, TV, entertainment and passionless sex (yes, I’m serious)
  • Look for silence to be able to concentrate on the pain

How long will it take before the waves are gone for good?

I don’t know, because it depends on countless factors.

But what I can tell you is that this is the only method that works in the long run.

A Chinese proverb says:

“Whether you walk fast or slow, the way remains the same.”

So it is with your pain. Whether you start dealing with it today or tomorrow, the degree remains the same.

Think of your pain as work to be done. You can tell yourself that it’s not there and distract yourself, but that doesn’t make the mountain shrink.

At this point, I want to emphasize again that it is not a good idea to distract yourself with other women.

Maybe now you’re thinking:

“But Dan, if I’m in a new relationship, it’ll help me move on from the old one.”

That may sound charming, but think logically…

How healthy will it really be to rush into a new relationship, when you haven’t processed the old one yet?

It would also be very selfish, because you are only using your new partner to get over your ex (strategy #1).

It is better to give yourself time to get over the past.

A bonus tip for open-minded and courageous men:

Maybe this tip is too extreme for you, but it’s powerful if you have the balls.

Go out into nature and sprint up a hill. Sprint like it’s the last thing you will ever do. It’s best to be all completely exhausted when you get to the top.

Then start screaming. Scream your throat out. And shake your whole body.

(Make sure you are in a safe environment. Ideally, you’re the only human being within a mile of this place.)

You’ll feel a strong sensation rising up inside you from below. You may burst into tears.

Don’t let this scare you. That’s good. Your body is dealing with the pain. And don’t worry, you’re still a man. 😉

As soon as the Niagara Falls coming out of your face slowly comes to a halt, you feel like a newborn.

If you dare to engage in this ritual, it will accelerate your spiritual healing process to a maximum.

Let out your masculine self with the help of this article:

>> 7 Ways to Get a More Masculine Edge (to Balance the Feminine)

Tip #2: Don’t be a junkie

Your body needs time to hormonally wean itself off your ex. In fact, it could be argued with perfect scientific coherence that your brain is addicted to this woman.

The main reason for this is the happiness hormone Dopamine. This is a very potent hormone and it was released every time you had a good time with your lost love.

But, my friend…

Those days are gone.

So now you’re probably feeling like a drug addict in rehab. What you need to do now is the exact same process a junkie has to go through:

You have to wean yourself off the drug.

Just as a junkie should stop using heroin, for example, you should avoid any contact with your ex.

This is not as easy as it sounds – I am well aware of that.

Every single cell in your body will be demanding it.

Your addiction will make you think:

“Oh, I guess a little contact will be okay. I’ll just send her a message…”

And that is exactly what the junkie tells himself, when he injects “only a small dose” of heroin, because “that is ok”.

No, it’s not okay.

Even the slightest contact can make you highly addicted again.

Every time you see or text her, your brain is stimulated to release new dopamine and the hormone chaos starts all over again.

This is something you can and should avoid with discipline.

>> Lovesickness – To Stop Resisting Is To Overcome: 3 Ways

Tip #3: Forget women

I know it sounds crazy, especially coming from a dating coach.

But just fuck women for a month or two…

And by “fuck them”, I actually mean “forget about them”.

Make sure that you can create what you want women to create for you, and make it happen yourself.

  • If you need a woman to feel loved, then get that love from your family, your friends and most of all from yourself.
  • If you need a woman to open up and have deep conversations, try it with some friends.
  • If you need a woman to give meaning to your life, seek that meaning in a mission that could make this world a better place.

You will be so busy living an epic life that hardly a thought is given to your past relationship.

When the time comes, the likelihood that you will get a relationship that makes you happy is highest that way.

And even if you don’t, this way is worth EVERY effort.

>> 10 Simple Things That Improve Your Life TODAY!

Tip #4: Date like tomorrow is the end of the world

Maybe you’re thinking now:

“What’s this crap now? First you tell me to forget women, then you tell me to go on dates. Are you schizophrenic or something, brother?”



Do you really think I’d be so diabolical and not explain it to you in detail?

  • We are now at the next step, which will only follow as soon as the waves of your sorrow are so weak that you can easily deal with life again.
  • What I meant before was that women are no solution to your problems. They’re human beings. And yes, you’re allowed to enjoy them as long as you don’t see them as a distraction.
  • I don’t want you to date just to get your balls empty, but more importantly, for an important skill…

Which skill?

Of course, I am talking about the noble skill of seduction.

And to become a master in the art of flirting, I recommend you check out my free Transformation Kit.

Including the 12 Lines that Always Hook, and 20+ flirting lines to get you started.


It’s not about constantly chasing after new women. It’s about knowing that you can meet great women at any time.

When you have this ability, you are much more relaxed in relationships, because you know:

“If this woman wants to leave, it’s okay. It might hurt for a while, because we were close. But then I’ll be able to meet other women I can have just as good a time with.”

>> 15 Hotspots to Meet Women Near You that Are 100% Your Type

Tip #5: How you know that you’re ready for new love

There are certain signs for this, which I have listed for you.

Stay out of a relationship when you…

  • Are not over your ex.
  • Are trying to numb the pain of your last breakup with alcohol, drugs, work or sex.
  • Expect a woman to make you happy.
  • Expect a woman to be exactly like your last girlfriend.
  • Don’t know how to actively meet women.
  • Are trying to force a woman into a relationship.

Throw yourself into a new love affair when you…

  • Love your life and are so wrapped up in it that you hardly think about relationships.
  • can look back on your past relationship(s) with love and gratitude.
  • Know how to meet women and get them excited about you.
  • Have friends you can rely on.
  • Have a job or a life mission that fulfills you.

The more of these points apply to you, the more likely you are to be ready for a new relationship…

… and ready to kick some gluteus assimus in life.

To help you find new love, check out my Transformation Kit.

There I share my best advice how to meet, and flirt with women. And take you through the dating process online and offline.

(I also prevent you from ending up in the friendzone)

May you do well!

Your bro,
Dan de Ram

Stop awkward conversations
and painful rejections

My free Transformation Kit will make you irresistible to women.

  • 12 Opening Lines that Actually Work
  • 5 Date Generating Texting Tips (Plus Copy-Paste Lines for Tinder)
  • The Friendzone Escape-Room Trick
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