Critics might say that I kiss too many women.
That may be true, but I just can’t help myself. When I meet a woman I like, I can’t help but want to put my lips onto hers…
However, I noticed two things during my kissing adventures:
- A lot of women are amazingly bad at kissing.
- If a woman can’t kiss well, that’s it for me.
I’m merciless. And I know a lot of women feel the same way. If a man isn’t at least a decent kisser, then he usually has no chance of ever getting into bed with her.
Of course, I wouldn’t want that to happen to you. So today I’m going to share my most useful tips so that women will literally hang on your lips.
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Kiss 101: The right moment to kiss
Ok, let’s be brutally honest for a moment: There was a time in my life when my lips were at most moistened by ChapStick.
I remember my first girlfriend. I knew her from my circle of friends. She had a huge crush on me, but of course this wasn’t so clear to past “zero checker” me.
She asked me to give her “extra lessons”. Even though she texted me her wish for “extra lessons” in quotation marks; I thought she meant it literally.
I’ll spare you the whole story (although it’s damn funny), but in the end we ended up at her house in her bedroom. We sat on her sofa and talked non-stop.
The virgin Dan waiting. Waiting for what? For the right moment to kiss her, of course!
And that moment just wasn’t going to come. Here are a few thoughts that went through my mind:
- “I can’t kiss her now, she’s talking.”
- “I’m going to go to the bathroom and when I come back I’ll just kiss her… hmm, naaah, I can’t do that…”
- “Maybe she just sees me as a friend and my kissing attempt could ruin our friendship…”
Suddenly it gets quiet… strangely quiet… we listened to music from her favorite band and didn’t say a word… HALF A HOUR LONG.
I thought to myself.
I slid so close to her that our mouths almost touched and so another ten minutes passed…
And then it finally happened… the long-awaited moment. We kissed. HALLELUJAH! That was one of the most beautiful moments in my life at that time.
The right time for a kiss?
It was probably an hour and a half earlier. I was just lucky in this case that she was at least as shy and inexperienced as I was.
Otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten very far with my “I’m a pussy” tactics.
One important lesson I’ve learned is that the right moment in case of doubt is sooner than you think.
Why earlier and when exactly? Let’s take a closer look at that now.
Learn how to kiss her at the right time
Whether you’re in a club talking to a nice lady or on a date.
The longer you talk to her, the more often you ask yourself:
But your hesitation increases with every minute passing until you end up not kissing at all. Ouch!
Or you try a quick kiss at the end, but she just turns her cheek towards you… even more painful.
The biggest mistake many men make is that they try to kiss a woman without having touched her before. Even though they’ve been talking to her for a long time.
No wonder those guys wonder if they can kiss the ladies. After all, they’ve done nothing to test whether the woman is ready.
But watch out: You have to warm a woman up first if you don’t want the kiss to be a negative surprise.
You can roughly compare it to not turning on the oven before you put the pizza in. It seems easier and quicker, but a frozen pizza that’s still completely frozen usually doesn’t taste very good, so turn up the heat, damn it!
How long it takes before you can kiss her depends on your situation. More specifically: On the woman and the circumstances.
Sometimes the moment is arrived after one hour and sometimes after five minutes (and sometimes even earlier!).
With this beauty, for example, it took some time (60 minutes) before she was ready to kiss in the club.
But when she finally did, the kiss was just that much more passionate. She wrapped her arms around me and five minutes later I got into a taxi with her towards my hotel room.
There are a few rules of thumb:
- In a club you shouldn’t wait longer than an hour before you at least try it. If you talk to her for two hours or more and get her number but don’t kiss her, the chance that you’ll see each other again is tiny. It’s a sign that you haven’t shown enough balls or built up enough attraction.
- You should definitely kiss her on a first date. And it doesn’t matter if you’ve known her for a long time or not. Don’t wait for a second or third date. She must be attracted to you to stay interested. A kiss is particularly useful for that. Don’t wait until the moment of saying goodbye to each other to kiss her.
How do you kiss a woman?
If you’re a loyal reader of my articles, you know that as a man, you should always take the lead. That’s extremely attractive to women.
You shouldn’t constantly wait for signs, but always take the necessary steps.
Start with your goal: You want to kiss her (or more).
And keep in mind the steps necessary to reach that goal…
Men would basically always kiss a woman they found attractive. This isn’t the case with women. They have to be warmed up first.
You do that by slowly building up physical contact. Initially, when you talk to her, you’ll touch her shoulders. You do this slowly, touching her back, taking her hand and dancing with her if necessary.
In the beginning everything happens in an innocent manner, which then slowly becomes more and more sexual.
This is how you communicate that you aren’t one of those harmless guys who are just here to chat, but that they’re in danger of ending up in bed with you.
You either end up in her friendzone or her dangerzone.
Make sure she feels comfortable being touched by you.
If you get into the habit of touching people you like, you’ll make yourself feel more and more comfortable.
It’s almost impossible to make the woman feel comfortable with your touch if you don’t feel comfortable doing it.
While you’re talking, get closer to her and speak slower and softer…
Everyone has his own “personal space”. That’s the space where you only let people you like into. The closer you can get to her, the more she’s attracted to you.
Your eye contact should become stronger the closer you get to the big moment where you kiss. If she looks at you with a wait-and-see look, then you know you can kiss her.
If her pupils dilate, it’s an indicator that she’s aroused. If you want to increase the tension even more, look long and deep into one eye, then slowly move your gaze to the other and then to her lips…
This is the magic triangle. Kissing is almost inevitable. It’s the logical next step!
Always take the lead and take one step at a time. As soon as you notice that she feels comfortable, you can take this as a green light to take the next step.
If you notice that she doesn’t really respond when you touch her or that she even distances herself from you, then take a step back and slowly rebuild it from the beginning.
Learn how to kiss her on a date or during the day
A good way to kiss her is if you’re on foot. The movement makes it easier to tease or touch her because it’s a “low-pressure” situation compared to a static sitting opposite each other.
Therefore, make sure that you include short walks on a date! This makes the date in general a bit more dynamic and fun.
I’m going to introduce you to one of my favorite ways to kiss a woman. It’s very go-getting and has a cool/romantic element of surprise.
Imagine you’ve been on your date for an hour and you decide to go for a walk…
Take her by the hand. Is her handshake firm? Squeeze it once and see if it squeezes back.
Green light? Then just stop abruptly after five minutes. Step silently before her, look deep into her eyes and kiss her.
This is damn masculine, romantic and exactly what they want to see in Hollywood movies. She rarely sees such passionate spontaneity in real life.
Another method is to find a bench and sit down. Then just grab her hand again (sitting is more intimate than running).
Turn in her direction, look into her eyes and kiss her SLOWLY.
Why do I emphasize the word “slowly” so much? Because it’s absolutely fundamental to kissing. If you’re too hasty, you can ruin the chances of her being open to the kiss.
How to (French) kiss like an expert
Before you kiss her, there are a few things you should consider so that it’ll be a “Wow!” experience for both of you.
Kissing tip #1: Make sure your breath is neutral
A good kiss and bad breath go together as well as Nutella and cheese.
So: Not at all!
But how do you notice your breath smells? Lick the back of your hand and smell it. Or fold your hands like a bowl, hold them in front of your mouth and nose and exhale. Now you can smell what others around you’ve smelled while talking to you.
Ensure clean teeth and a hygienic oral cavity. Also clean your tongue when brushing your teeth. Use gum, tic tac or Fishermen’s Friends.
That you shouldn’t eat strong smelling things like onions or garlic before a date should be a matter of course and yet men make this mistake again and again…
Kissing tip #2: Make sure your lips are smooth
If you have dry lips, then a kiss from you will automatically become a less great experience.
Moisten your lips a little beforehand. This makes it more pleasant for your partner to kiss you. Take care for your lips.. In my opinion, cream usually works much better than a regular ChapStick.
Women should ensure that their mouth is free of lip gloss and lipstick. If it does rub off on your lips, you at least have a good reason to go to the bathroom with her.
Kissing tip #3: Comfortable kissing position
Ensure a comfortable position when kissing. Make sure that you stand relaxed and loose and that your cervical spine isn’t extremely overstretched.
A good starting position is the basis of a good kiss.
Kissing tip #4: Relax your lips
When you are tense, you show her that you can’t control yourself. It’s like you’re either nervous or megahorny. Also, it doesn’t feel good for both of you when you tense up like this.
When you’re relaxed, it feels as smooth as a piece of melting butter.
Try to relax your lips and tongue even more than you normally would with your next kiss.
Watch how she reacts. She may get even more excited than before!
Kissing tip #5: Start carefully and follow your feeling
When I ask women about bad kissing experiences, 90% of the time the answer is:
And they say it so nauseatingly that you’d think that women hate French kissing…
But that’s not the case. The problem is a lot of men go all-in right away.
The first contact of the lips should be done carefully. Then follow your instincts. Kiss only with your lips first. After a while, use your tongue extremely moderately and see how she reacts. If she likes it, you can gradually increase the amount of tongue input.
When she opens her mouth, you can play with her tongue. But don’t overdo it. Close your mouth again after 3-5 seconds so that your lips touch again and repeat the whole thing instead of letting your tongues wrestle all the time.
Make it interesting by adding variation. Bite her lip carefully (this shouldn’t hurt but only stimulate), turn your tongue first in one direction, then in the other and then you can apply a very dominant but simple move: Turn her head gently to the side with your hand and kiss her neck. This makes women go completely crazy!
But you’ll find out more about that later.
Kissing tip #6: No matter how exciting it gets…
… Stay chilled!
It’s not a race. Enjoy it!
Click here if you want to know what an excellent kiss looks like in practice. Of course, demonstrated by two female eye candy. 😉
Kissing tip #7: Don’t get stuck on her
Make sure that YOU are the person who stops first. Grab her gently, go somewhere else, and continue there or make sure you see each other later.
It’s best to stop at a climax so that she thinks long about how good you’re at kissing and longs for more.
Kissing tip #8: Watch her breathing
Breathing is crucial during kissing. It indicates the intensity with which she wants to be kissed.
Breathing should be done through the nose and not through the mouth. It’s best if your breathing is synchronized after a time.
It’s a beautiful sign of her devotion when she inhales just before the kiss. A slight exhalation directly before the kiss can be a sign that she’s slightly bored. Of course, one could also see this in other signs…
In contrast, shortness of breath is a clear sign of arousal. She may even groan slightly. If that’s the case, you’re on the right track!
Kiss tip #9: Feel the intensity
This might sound a bit woo-woo, but a feeling for the intensity of her feelings is essential. Imagine the following two situations:
- A woman wants you to kiss her gently to get to know you and you immediately go all in.
- A woman wants you to kiss her as if your life depended on it, and you kiss her as if she were a toddler picking up a kiss from mom before bedtime.
In neither of those situations there will be the perfect kissing chemistry. The feeling of intensity it requires and the projection of desire on your part are therefore extremely important.
Her feelings for you have a certain intensity and this intensity can be seen through her body language.
She indicates what she likes and dislikes and her breathing gives you additional important clues about how strong her feelings are for you at that moment.
Other body language signs for high intensity are also when she brings her body closer to you or when she throws her arms around you.
Kissing tip #10: The art of stopping
Feeling when to stop makes all the difference. A kiss that lasts too long will only have a negative effect.
Anyway, you should follow the rule that you finish kissing first. This shows that you’re in control of yourself and of the situation. In addition, it makes her ask for more.
Her body will show you when it’s time to end the kiss – but better too early than too late! Make it a habit to stop kisses abruptly again and again.
This makes you unpredictable and therefore interesting. Because what would she rather tell her friends about? About making out in the middle of the dancefloor or about an exciting experience including cliffhanger with a mysterious man?
Kissing Tip #11: Modelling
A technique known from the psychology of success to improve in one thing is called “modelling”.
Modelling describes copying success strategies by analyzing certain role models.
So my tip to you is quite simple: Find a successful role model and see what he does.
They can be friends, people on the street, actors or even porn stars…
The art of a good kiss is also a central point in many films. Whether the first kiss between Rachel and Ross from Friends or the famous Spiderman kiss…
… A kiss is always a highlight.
So, look closely and learn.
Kissing tip #12: Kissing is an art
You’ll like this tip best.
To become a master kisser, you need to practice a lot. But it’s not that the people who kiss the most are the best kissers.
Of course, you have to experiment.
The more different women you kiss, the more diverse the situations and places you kiss and the more often you try something new, the more your kisses become an art.
Become the Picasso of kissing.
From kiss to sex
Kissing is often the beginning of more. But how do you build a bridge to sex?
If you use the techniques below, you’ll gain an unfair advantage over other men.
It’s possible to bind a woman to you just by kissing her in such a way that she wants to be alone with you and can’t get enough of you.
Here are the tips that will help you make a smooth transition from kissing to sex.
Tip #13: Know why you kiss
This sounds strange at first sight. Let me put it this way:
What is kissing? Exactly! It’s a form of foreplay.
The most important rule in foreplay is that you make her ask for more and more.
You don’t achieve this by running your head through the wall, but by deliberately taking a few detours. Why would she go home with a guy who already saturated her at the club?
Don’t be the blunt make-out guy!
Tip #14: Variation
I hope it’s clear by now that a kiss isn’t just the meeting of two people’s lips. There are countless things you can do.
The goal should be to bring in variation. Stop making the same movements with your tongue all the time.
Here are things you can do to make a kiss more versatile:
- Hold her face when you kiss her.
- Bite her lip.
- Kiss her hard with tongue, stop suddenly and say with a grin, “That’ll have to do for now.”
- Get your lips close to hers, open your mouth slightly, but don’t kiss her. Hold that tension for a while.
- Whisper in her ear what she should do. Like: “Kiss my neck. More. “
- Push her against the wall while you kiss her.
- Lean comfortably against the wall and let her invest more.
- Pick her up and kiss her.
Tip #15: Kiss her where it counts
Discover her erogenous zones. Does she like it when you kiss her neck? What if you’re dominating her? Does she enjoy it when you pat her on the back? What happens if you nibble her earlobe? Or if you grab her tight ass?
Pay attention to the signs she sends out when you kiss her. Is she trembling? Is her breathing getting faster? Is she gripping you tighter?
Try everything you have in your erogenous database. Every woman is unique. Some women don’t believe in kissing at all (I’ve heard that many times, but I’ve never met such a woman before).
Other women almost get an orgasm if you handle them properly.
Experiment with it but remember that kissing is an art and not a science. You’re an artist. Enjoy every single brushstroke you make.
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Dan de Ram