What I Did when I Really Wanted a Girlfriend

Sometimes you feel lonely.

You stroll along the streets and see hand-holding couples everywhere.

At family gatherings, you are asked if you have a girlfriend, and you have to disappoint your uncles and aunts with another “No, unfortunately, I dont…”

Each of your friends has a woman at his side. Except for you…

“I want a girlfriend!” you think to yourself, and you’re sure you deserve one.

And yet it still hasn’t happened yet…

But every time you think you can’t go on like this…

Dan de Ram comes out of his man cave to show you da way.

Don’t worry, my friend. Today you will learn how to go from being cannon fodder to a legendary conqueror.

What awaits you:

  • The truth: What you really want
  • “I want a girlfriend!”: What a free sandwich has to do with getting a relationship
  • The best places to meet your future girlfriend
  • The Relationship Master Plan: 5 steps to a relationship
  • The ingenious question that makes her your girlfriend
  • And much more…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

But before we get started…


I understand that you want a girlfriend.

Every man – even the king of the fuckboylands – has a deep desire for intimacy and love.

It doesn’t matter how much you yell “I don’t want a relationship” or how many one-night-stands you kick out of your apartment after sex…

When you say “I only want something casual, I’m not interested in anything else!” you’re lying to yourself.

If you’re completely honest, you can’t deny it: You like the thought that a woman thinks of you, misses you and is looking forward to seeing you again.

A man longs for closeness.

So I perfectly understand that you want a girlfriend…

And yet I think you’re arrogant.


Because you pretend to be better than the other men who only want sex. You act as if you were to good to just sleep with lots of women. Your goals are more noble: you want to fall in love.

>> 7 Art of Flirting Myths that Keep You Lonely + How to Find Love.

Don’t fool yourself, amigo.

Of course you want sex, and it’s okay to want it. It is an important aspect of any relationship.

I always find it fascinating how many men claim that sex is not important to them while sitting in front of their laptops every night, scrolling through the latest porn hub videos, and exercising foreskin acrobatics.

Whether you are honest with yourself and claim that you want sex, or continue to pretend to be Dr. Noblestein Innocenticus, doesn’t matter, because the ways to get there are almost identical.

I have rarely been asked by a man who has sex regularly how to get a girlfriend. It is always the men who have little or no sex that ask me this question.

Even if you just want a relationship, you should work on your seduction skills, so that you know exactly how to make a woman so hot for you that she wants nothing more than to be grabbed, loved and kept by you.

The best way to explain this is with my sandwich analogy:

Wanting a girlfriend is almost like wanting a free sandwich.

Of course, you could just walk into a bakery and buy the sandwich. If you throw enough money on the table, the sandwich is all yours.

So it is with some women. There are fewer of this kind than one would assume, but let’s not pretend they don’t exist: Gold Diggers, who would love to be your girlfriend, if they can enjoy your money in return.

But you don’t want that and I don’t want that.

You want the sandwich to be a gift.

But how do you get one for free?

If you want a girlfriend while lacking seduction skills, it’s like walking into a bakery, pointing at the baker girl and saying, “Hey, give me a free sandwich.”

She will look at you shaking her head, and tell you that this is not how it works (if she is nice). Even a “I want that sandwich so bad!” won’t do you much good.

Your only chance would be to meet a baker girl who can’t say no. But that’s probably not what you want either.

What else can you do?

Imagine that you are well-known, popular and everyone around you knows how valuable you are.

Then you just casually walk into the bakery and the girl behind the counter says:

“Aaaah hey!! I’m glad you’re here. We’ve been hoping you’d drop by all day! Here, take this sandwich! Don’t worry, it’s on the house.”

You ask “for real?”

“Yeah, yeah, for sure. You’ve already given us so much, and we want to return the favor.”

Et voilà, you have a sandwich in your hand. Free of charge. You didn’t have to bother, you didn’t have to beg, and the best thing about it: it’s a beauty.

I hope my hidden message did not slip through your fingers.

>> List of Facial Expression (With Examples) + The 5 Looks Women Find Most Attractive.

Even if you want a girlfriend, you should still…

      • Meet a lot of women
      • Know how to seduce women
      • Be better than average in bed
      • Have your social and financial life under control

If you still have to polish these points, THIS should be your goal – not a relationship.

It’s very important to me that you understand that.

“I want my girlfriend!” 5 places to meet your potential girlfriend

I think you are aware that a girlfriend doesn’t just fall out of the sky, otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this article.

Firstly, you have to meet a woman who is cool enough to keep.

But where do you best meet women?

There is no clear answer to this question.

Beatles, Drake… Star Wars or Star Trek… football or martial arts… One is no better than the other.

Nevertheless, everyone has their own individual preferences. In the same way, there are places where you would rather meet women than others.

Maybe you can maneuver your body better through a chaotic club than through a cozy shopping street. Or maybe you have a very tight schedule and therefore like to resort to online dating.

Every fisherman has his own waters in which he prefers to fish. And, as is the case with flirting, where you genuinely like to go yourself is often the best place to meet women as well.

>> 15 Hotspots to Meet Women Near You that Are 100% Your Type.

So choose your waters and make the best of it.

But I want to give you permission to succeed at ALL of these places. 😉

You have the following options:

During the day

Be honest: How often on the way to work, while shopping for new jeans or waiting for the delayed train, do you come across a woman who is simply “Wooow”?

And how often do you let this chance slip away?

I have one simple rule: You checked her out, so you have to say hi.

The next time you stare at a woman because she is spicier than pepper, you will hear my voice in your head and snatch the opportunity with both hands.

The advantages:

  • You have little competition
  • It shows right away that you have balls (women like balls)
  • Women are usually open and friendly

The disadvantages:

  • It’s hard to overcome fear
  • People are often busy during the day
  • Others see what you do, so you put social pressure on the women


At night

People go out to meet other people… not just to get drunk.

Be aware of that.

Women look around for potential adventures, even if they would never admit it.

Be aware of that, too.

Do you really buy it when they say, “Nah, I just dress up for myself and go out dancing”?

If so, I think it’s cute how naive you are. If not, you’re a smart Dude.

The advantages:

  • It’s more normal to approach a woman at night
  • Most are in a social state
  • There is a relaxed atmosphere in which can speed up the conversation

The disadvantages:

  • A lot of competition
  • You need very good body language
  • Time and money investment

Circle of friends

You have a lot of friends? Nice!

Your friends have a lot of friends? Very nice!

>> How a Dating Coach For Men Can Help You (+ What To Watch Out For).

This means that you have a large circle of acquaintances in which you might fight your future girlfriend almost automatically.

The advantages:

  • You easily and regularly come into contact with the same women
  • You don’t have to get over yourself to talk to them
  • You are in the same circle of friends for a reason. So you have something in common and this is a good start

The disadvantages:

  • Your friends might find out about it, which might create unnecessary pressure
  • If it doesn’t work, it’ll be weird
  • Small selection of women


Single events

You don’t want to get your hands dirty and would rather get served with single women on a silver platter?

Then you can visit Single Events.

The advantages:

  • All women are single
  • It is often not necessary to approach a woman
  • Usually the women are very open

The disadvantages:

  • You often meet desperate women who want a relationship too much
  • Often too short a time to get to know each other
  • The “meetings” are often structured



There are countless apps and websites where you can meet a woman who thinks your plan to take over world domination is stupid enough to be part of it.

The advantages:

  • You don’t have to overcome your approach anxiety
  • You can take your time with your answers
  • You have access to beautiful women at all times

The disadvantages:

  • You need a strong profile
  • You must be good at flirting in text form
  • People present themselves better than they really are

The Relationship Master Plan: How to get a (new) girlfriend in 5 steps

“Every minute you spend in planning saves 10 minutes in execution; this gives you a 1000 percent return on energy”
– Brian Tracy

Step #1: Suit up!

Do women usually turn away when you speak to them?

It’s not necessarily because of your pickup line.

You should make sure that you do not frighten them off through small but disastrous details.

Many flirt coaches will lie to you, but a good appearance will indeed help you enormously with women.

You don’t have to look like a Hollywood star, but style and styling paired with a few simple hacks will give your appearance that certain “Uh lala!

Here’s a checklist:

  • Make sure you have nice clothes.
  • Speak loud and deep like the boss you are.
  • Stand up straight with your shoulder blades pulled back
  • Look into her eyes with a smile.

Step #2: Master flirting

“Dan, what is flirting?”

Go here:

>> What is Flirting? 9 Tips to Become A Professional Flirt

Step #3: Master your WhatsApp skills

Digital flirting is different from flirting in the outside world.

You can’t score with your body language, your voice, or your adorable smile.

Now it is important to fascinate her exclusively through words.

Maybe it’s not your thing, but these days you can’t get around it.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we’re not living in the Stone Age anymore. We text. Either accept it or move to a country where the Internet does not yet exist.

>> 22 Flirty Text Messages (+ Examples) That Will Make Her Want You More

Step #4: Master your dates

You approached her. Check!

You have her under your spell. Check!

You got her excited for a date through the power of your written word. Check!

That means: The first date is on.

It is largely up to you whether it will be a success, and she wants to see you again, or whether you will receive the message the next day:

I liked it very much. But there was no click. Sorry!

Here are some quick tips:

  • Don’t think of it as a date. That way, you put less pressure on yourself and her
  • The principles of attraction still apply. Just because she’s on a date with you, it doesn’t mean you don’t have to seduce her now
  • Make sure you have a plan. The fewer things you have to leave to chance, the better

“A goal without a plan is nothing more than a dream.”
– Dave Ramsey

>> Ultimate First Date Guide for Men (21 Tips That Work)

Step #5: Create a deep connection

Wow! She’s just incredible…

A pleasant shiver runs through your body when you think of her. You’re sure you want to keep her.

Okay, first of all, congratulations, brochacho!

But how do you make sure she sees more than just a fling in you?

Well, if you want to make her your girlfriend, you shouldn’t listen to me.


Because I often have to prevent a woman from falling in love with me.


  • Because I travel a lot…
  • Because I’m very focused on my work.
  • Because I’m demonstrating techniques for kissing women at record speed…

So a steady girlfriend doesn’t fit into my life right now.

So I make sure that a woman doesn’t get a total crush on me.

These are things I avoid:

  • Talking about our childhood
  • Long conversations over texting
  • Meeting several times a week (once a week is already too much for me)
  • Philosophizing about the meaning of life after sex
  • Falling asleep cuddled up
  • Getting to know her friends or family

But you, my friend, want a girlfriend.

So you can see the things I avoid as a checklist.

In this way she will feel strongly connected to you and enjoy your closeness. She can let herself fall more and more, and build deep trust in you.

And that can truly inspire even the most cold-hearted player.

>> 31 Voted Best Pick-Up Lines in the World (Online & Offline).

How to make it official

They always say “the man must make the first step”, and I agree for the most part.

  • The man approaches the woman
  • The man falls to his knees to propose to the woman
  • The first one to say at a wedding “Yes, I do” is the man

But when it comes to making her your girlfriend…

… then you want HER to be the first to say:

  • “I am falling in love with you.”
  • “I love you.”
  • “I want to be with you.”

This is due to the fact that men usually want to get into a relationship too quickly.

With women, it can sometimes take a while before they are 100% sure that they want to have a relationship with you.

With men, this sometimes happens frighteningly fast.

Admit it, you have seen a stunning woman before and you immediately thought: “Holy shit… I’d marry her right now! ” 😉

We can sometimes decide with a wink whether we want a woman or not.

If you start too early with relationship talk, here’s what happens:

  • You put pressure on her
  • You show that you’re afraid of losing her

So a much better strategy is to make her so crazy about you that she wants to keep YOU attached to her, rather than the other way around.

How you can do that, you will find out in this article.

But what if she never does?

You have been meeting for months now, having passionate sex and being extremely tender with each other.

You don’t want to wait forever for her to ask the ultimate question:

“What is this between us?”

In that case, I have an ingenious method for you. A smart question, which does not put her under pressure and still leads you to your goal: a relationship with her.

This question has already given me and many others to whom I have given this tip a fantastic relationship.

It reads… Drum roll, please!

*Drums kicking in*

“How would you like it if tomorrow I called you my girlfriend?”

*Guitar solo*

Absolutely brilliant.

The good thing about it is that you have nothing to lose and much to gain.

If she’s not ready, she’ll take it as a purely hypothetical question. But if she does want a relationship with you, she’ll say something like: “Yes, that would be great…”

And then you can make it official.

When should you ask that question?

Preferably at a moment when you both feel very close.

This can either be after sex, when she is naked in your arms or during a romantic rendezvous.

>> Sex on First Date: A Step-by-Step-Guide from ‘Hi’ to ‘Take Me Home’.

How to get your dream girlfriend

So bro, now you know how to make a woman your girlfriend.

Next time you see a couple holding hands or kissing in the park and you feel lonely, I hope you know exactly what to do.

To sum up:

  1. Stop with the whining
  2. Take motherfu*%ing action
  3. Make women totally crazy about you
  4. “How would you like it if tomorrow I called you my girlfriend?”
  5. Write me an e-mail to dan@attractiongym.com (I love success stories like this, so keep sending them!)

And to make sure you engrain this 5 step system into your brains, I have created a free Transformation Kit.

It will turn you from an unattractive creature to a magnetic man. Because it includes my best advice about meeting, flirting and dating girls. Both online and offline.

Get your Transformation Kit here now.

See you on the other side.

Your bro,
Dan de Ram

Stop awkward conversations
and painful rejections

My free Transformation Kit will make you irresistible to women.

  • 12 Opening Lines that Actually Work
  • 5 Date Generating Texting Tips (Plus Copy-Paste Lines for Tinder)
  • The Friendzone Escape-Room Trick
Yes, give me the Transformation Kit!

Related articles


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *