Letting Go of Someone You Love: 11 Painless Ways to Move On

letting go of someone you love

Everything you see, do or hear, reminds you of that one perfect woman.

That woman that you had in your life, but you could not keep for various reasons.

“What if?”, “What would it be like?”, “If only I had …”

All thoughts that go through your mind, trying to get her back.

But I’m going to be honest with you:

The best you can do:

Let her go.

This way you can pick up your life again and focus on the future.

Instead of being stuck in the past.

And I’ll help you with this.

You get:

  • 9 Tips to letting go of someone you love and pick up your life again
  • 3 Reasons to pull the plug out of relationship life support
  • Why it’s hard to let go of someone you love
  • Destroy all remnants that hold you back, using my free tool
  • Much more on how to let go of love…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

Tip #1: Spartan kick your relationship to oblivion might be the best solution

People sometimes stay in a relationship for years, when it actually died ages ago.

Often out of for fear of the unknown. Out of fear for the fact that you might not get anyone else anymore.

That is why I have written a short checklist for you here.

Knowing when to let go of someone you love is better than potentially wasting years struggling in a half-alive relationship.

#1: You have no life without your relationship

Relationships are there to enrich your life.

Two people who like to share their life with the other.

Unfortunately, there are also relationships that only suck the life out of you.

Even though a big aspect of a relationship is that in some times you have to put yourself in the second place for the other, it does not mean that you have to erase yourself from the relationship.

That all your energy and time must be put into the relationship and that you no longer have time to yourself.

If this is the case, you are constantly trying to save the relationship …

… then it’s time to let go of your love.

#2: Your relationship is like a cluster grenade

Bloody buggers.

At a small height above the site of impact, these rascals explode and even a battalion of Japanese would not be able to calculate what else goes up in flames in the area.

Relationships can cause the same collateral damage.

For example, through jealousy, you no longer let the other person go out without an ankle brace.

(If you’re dealing with jealousy in your relationship, here’s an article about it:

>> How Not To Be Jealous In A Relationship, Is It Possible? 3 Best Ways)

Or you claim the other person, to make sure that the other stays with you.

But this affects other relationships that you have.

You will see family less.

Friends come to visit less often.

In addition, you reveal your negativity about your relationship when you are with them.

And negativity is actually contagious research tells us.

This way, the cozy family and friend’s atmosphere is rapidly changing into the atmosphere of a cold, gray, castle on the dark side of the moon.

This is the moment to pull the plug out of the relationship, no matter how stuck it may be.

#3: It is in vain

Slot machines are a good example of this.

Coin after coin you roll in the machine. Again and again you pull the lever.

But you’re not winning.

This can also occur in a relationship. You keep putting effort into it, you keep trying, you keep wanting to succeed together.

But it doesn’t work.

About time to throw in the towel and to accept that you have to let go of love. The princple of acception is actually the first start.

Instead of putting all the hope on the next coin.

And get another kick in your stomach, the moment no results are achieved.

Give love itself a kick to the pit of oblivion.

Now, it’s possible that your relationship is in a rut.

If you want to get over it, there’s hope. Check out this article to find out how:

>> 10 Tips to Have More Ups + Less Downs in Your Relationship

Tip #2: Why letting go of someone you love feels like losing a kidney

This is the #1 reason:

People are often not satisfied with themselves. Letting go of love means that you only remain by yourself, while you don’t want to be by yourself.

But let’s take a closer look at why letting go of love is so painful.

Everyone is looking for something that has significance us.

We identify ourselves with this significance.

In relationships this means the following:

“I am Danielle’s boyfriend.”


“I’m Dan’s girlfriend.”

You give a piece of yourself to the relationship.

When the relationship is threatened to be flushed down the toilet, a part of yourself is also threatened to flush into the sewer.

And with that your significance.


And this so-called bite out of ourselves feels like emptiness.

You wonder if there is any meaning/significance left for you, or if you are just wasting a bit of everyone’s space.

Now you can refill this void in two ways and in the following 9 tips I will tell you exactly HOW.

The way in which you only sink further into the cavity that you slowly eat further and further is by not accepting that it is over.

Continuously looking at the past, hoping it will come back.

Getting stuck in the past, while the future continues unhindered.

Therefore, this tip:

Tip #3: How to get over someone you love deeply

Let go.

Time to turn your head towards the future.

And if you notice yourself thinking back about her every minute of the day, use the energy to go and look for your new girlfriend.

Because you do not really miss YOUR EX.

Look at it this way:

You buy a phone to stay in touch with your friends and family, since writing letters is out of fashion today.

That phone doesn’t do much to you, it’s the contact that makes you happy.

Same thing about your girlfriend you want back.

You don’t want her body back.

You want the feelings she gave you back.

And this a lot of men don’t see.

Her body and the feelings for her are two different things.

Every female body could theoretically evoke the same feelings in you.

So you just have to find a new body and your desires for the feelings are fulfilled.

Dan, that’s great but where I am supposed to meet a new girl? It’s easier said than done!

Very good question, man. But trust me, meeting women is not as hard as it seems.

The first step is knowing where to go. Here’s an entire article about it, check it out:

>> 15 Hotspots to Meet Women Near You that Are 100% Your Type

Tip #4: The most important choice of your romantic life

“What if…”

“What if I didn’t get mad at her then, maybe we would still be together.”

Yes, maybe.

Isn’t that just bad luck now?

Now you are no longer together and you have to let her go.

But have you ever stopped to think that, if you hadn’t gotten mad at her, then she might have packed her things and left much earlier?

Getting angry was perhaps the right choice, standing on your limits and not just being pushed away is something that women find attractive.

Choices that you have made in the past have been made. Nothing can be changed about that anymore.

And now you are faced with a choice again:

Are you going to stare through the window on the edge of your bed all gloomy?

Or do you get up and look forward to a new productive day?

Tip #5: This is how you make it very difficult for Sherlock Holmes

Many men fall for this mistake.

They try, against all knowledge, to get their old love back.

They think that if they succeed, they will be happy again.

And there is a reasonable logic to that …

However, this is based on the fact that it MUST succeed.

And those odds, if I may be honest, are zero.

In addition, you slowly develop a negative thought:

As if she is the last woman on earth. That you need her to survive.


She is not the last banana on earth to be cherished.

You develop the negative thought:

“I’m never going to get someone like her again.”

But suppose you describe her now, for example:

Blond, stylishly dressed, dry humor, feminine appearance, loving and loyal.


I will reveal something to you:

There are countless women with this description.

Alright Dan, this might be true. But there’s a problem: I’m not really the social type. I rarely meet women and when I do, I don’t what to do.”

I got you, brother. I wrote an article on how to be a more outgoing person, read it here:

>> 23 Easy Ways to Be More Social with Women as an Introvert

Tip #6: Your love-thoughts are fooling you

You’ve probably been apart for a while.

However, you just cannot let her go out of your mind.

You fantasize about the fact that she was so special, so beautiful, so perfect.

But let me puncture this balloon with a pin …

… and tell you that your thoughts are lying to you:

  • That she actually had a pimple on her upper lip that always frightened you when it suddenly looked at you from an unexpected angle.
  • That she was always late on dates.
  • And that she always made comments about everything we do not do that is bad for this world.

That is the blind spot of your thoughts.

Your thoughts often only let the beautiful moments appear in front of your eyes.

But the reality is always a lot less pretty than your thoughts make you think.

So remember what I just told you.

And let go of your not-so-perfect-love.

Tip #7: You may only meet her in your dreams

Photo of you together?


Necklace for her for Valentine’s Day?


Her favorite sweater?


Everything that reminds you of her?

You get the gist:


I don’t care how you do it. But it’s time to walk away from the one you loved.

If it were up to me, you can put it neatly in a garbage bag, bury it in your backyard in the hope that a tree will grow out of it, or stick it to a rocket with New Year’s and shoot it into space …

As long as it’s gone and there’s nothing that can remind you of her.

Because every time you come across something that reminds you of her, you get sucked back to the past …

… You start longing for her again …

And you can’t move on

While forward is the only direction you can go.

And going forward requires you to let go of the one you love.

Terrified of the fact of being single again? Don’t worry. Here’s the ultimate guide to being happy and single:

>> The Real Secret to Being Happy and Single – 5 Tips

Tip #8: Distract yourself to let go of love in a heartbeat

Open your contacts and send the first one you see a message if they feel like having a beer.

Ask the next one to go out with you during the weekend.

Call another person who lives farther away and cannot make an appointment so easily.


You don’t have to let go of the person you loved alone.

Friends can help you with this.

And by spreading the emotions over several people, you have forgotten about her in no time.

Tip #9: Make yourself busy

All the time for yourself.

Time to go do things that you always wanted to do.

Embark on your hobby again, work hard for that promotion, or jump out of an airplane if you’ve always wanted to do that (with parachute please)

The trick is to split large projects into small steps.

Otherwise it comes down to you as way too much work.

And pondering about letting go of your love is a simpler, but unfortunately, no better way out.

I know its hard to let go of someone you love. But take a small step towards your goal every day.

That is the key to healthy distraction.

So you don’t have time to think about her.

But prevent this serious mistake.

Tip #10: Social media and letting someone go

Finding distraction is good, but if that means that you will spend hours wandering through her social media, then you are still doing the wrong thing.

Delete, block and ban.

She may not occupy any pixel space in your news feed.

The disadvantage with social media is that you only see the best moments of someone’s life.

It’s not going to help you seeing her best selfies, seeing her party with all kinds of people and other men or other activities she’s busy with doing.

You start to think that your life is many times worse than hers. That way, letting go of her becomes seven times more difficult.

Don’t forget that that photo of her is just a snapshot. A happy moment in possibly a terrible time.

Tip #11: How do you surgically cut her out of your thoughts?

You have probably spent hundreds or thousands of hours with her.

Just like cycling, driving, or typing blindly, the actions are in your memory like muscle memory.

Your girlfriend is also still “stuck” in your memory.

And now I know from experience that you can easily unlearn how to ride bicycles.

However, getting your girlfriend out of your head, is a different story.

You also have to put hundreds of hours of other activities against it.


Make sure that you consciously put yourself forward on the road every day. And not on the way to the thoughts of your girlfriend.

You have an opportunity to work on yourself. Use it.

Improve your life and become a happier person. How do you that?

I wrote everything you need to know about this topic in an article, check it out:

>> 10 Simple Things That Improve Your Life TODAY!

Bonus: The disease that makes letting go of love impossible

The disease that makes you feel as if there is one specific woman who is special.

As if she is Ho-Oh from the first Pokémon series.

In Pokémon world, only one Ho-Oh may exist.

But, there are thousands of women on earth who are special.

If this cannot penetrate your system, then you suffer from oneitis.

Cut the last thread with my free tool

No matter how well you think you have let go of your loved one…

… There are always remnants that hold you back in your life.

To realize your full potential, it is necessary to put the keep cutting until the last thread.

My free Transformation Kit will take care of that. Download it here!

Everything for a fresh start, I wrapped in one easy package.

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From your bro,
Dan de Ram

Stop awkward conversations
and painful rejections

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