You don’t know me yet?
Yes? -> Welcome to another insightful article about online dating.
No? -> Shame on you.
Here is a brief summary of what I do: I’ve been helping men become abnormally good with women for over a decade.
And that includes online dating.
Why? Have you ever looked out the window? It’s the 21st f*cking century, amigo.
It doesn’t matter what I, you, or anyone else thinks about online dating. The fact is: Many men get to know one beautiful woman after another through apps like Tinder, Bumble, or Badoo.
Now, of course, there are the critics who proudly claim that they don’t need something like online dating. But let them continue to masturbate in their socks while you and I regularly have dates.
I must admit, by the way, that I’m actually a proud Tinder Trooper. I like the design of Tinder better than most other dating apps; it doesn’t shoot advertising in your face all the time, and the women are a bit more active than on Badoo or Bumble.
However, in comparison to Badoo, Tinder lacks a powerful feature Badoo offers.
Which one? On Badoo, you can text women without having to match them beforehand.
Regardless of what app you use, in today’s article, I’m going to show you great openers for online dating, which you can use on any platform.
- The foundation of the best opener for online dating (if you don’t have that, even the wittiest opener won’t help you)
- The modalities of effective openers (3 tips to create your own first text
- 5 tested witty openers for online dating, which she can’t ignore (+ screenshots)
- And much more…
By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?
You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
A good opener for online dating won’t do you well unless you do THIS
Did you see the movie “The Hunchback of Notre Dame?”
Since Notre Dame has become relevant because of the fire, I remembered the story of Quasimodo and Esmeralda again.
The butt-ugly Fukushima-born Quasimodo managed to attract the attention of the beautiful and much sought-after Esmeralda.
Okay, he landed gloriously in the friendzone, but we’re going to stop that from happening to you.
How did he manage that?
Well, he showed her through heroics that he’s a unique man.
So, if you’re an online Quasimodo (= you don’t have a nice profile), the opener allows you to contact your online Esmeralda with a heroic message.
Two things you should consider, though:
- Online Esmeralda is flooded with messages every day
- The worse your profile is, the less likely she’s to respond to your text (but more about that later)
But let’s just say your profile is so good, I’d be proud of you.
Female swiping behavior differs significantly from male swiping behavior.
I already know how you swipe, you little pig…
Your finger glides across your screen until you reach the maximum number of swipes.
But I don’t need to point my finger at you here – I’m no different.
With women, however, you can assume that they swipe much less than men.
If you consider that an attractive woman already has taken care of herself for a week as soon as she swipes right five times, this also makes sense.
So the bad news is:
The probability that your profile will be displayed to her in the match game at all is relatively low.
Remember, in most of the online dating apps, the percentage of women is lower in relation to men using dating apps.
So, your profile will only be shown to her if the app’s complicated algorithm is on your side.
However, if you get a match, you have the unique chance to hit her up.
But like I already told you:
Other men have had the same idea.
Lots of men, in fact…
So, just texting her isn’t enough to set you apart from the crowd. The content of this message must also stand out.
But for that, you have your ultimate bro or – more specifically – this article.
Because in two minutes, I’m going to show you exactly how to create outstanding openers.
But before I do, I want you to understand one thing.
The foundation of a perfect icebreaker
I don’t like the name “icebreaker.”
Because I don’t think it’s appropriate.
Because shit ain’t getting broken.
If you really think that a single message can break the ice between you and your online Esmeralda, you’re more naive than I thought.
If I had my way, I would describe your opener more as a “flare gun” instead of an icebreaker.
It would sound epic, don’t you think?
This name would at least be more appropriate. Because through your opener, you do nothing else but draw the woman’s attention to something specific… to your profile.
Your profile is the foundation of your opener.
As for my competition: Don’t think I don’t see you. “21 openers that guarantee a response,” etcetera. Don’t be ridiculous, darlings.
Objectively speaking, I understand why they phrase it that way. After all, it’s exactly what the customers want to hear.
But I don’t really give a shit what you want to hear. I’m telling you the truth. Hate me today, but thank me tomorrow.
My point is that if you think that the quality of your opener alone is responsible for whether you get a response, then you’ve been sniffing too many glue sticks.
You shoot a signal in her direction with your first text to make her aware of your profile. And then there are actually only three options:
1: Your first text is bad and will be rejected immediately.
2: Your text is good; she looks at your bad profile and doesn’t respond.
3: Your text is good; your profile is good, and she responds.
So if you took anything from my little speech of anger, I hope it was this:
Get a badass profile.
3 Tips for creating your own perfect opener
Later I’ll show you five tested examples. Copy them as shamelessly as you think necessary. You’ll have more success with that.
But you know what a real boss’s move is?
Think of it merely as INSPIRATION
I would be most proud of you if you created your own openers.
- Maybe some other bro has already used my line on her, and you’re making a fool of yourself
- The world needs authentic people (there are so few of them)
I’ll make it as easy as possible for you to create your own first text by telling you now what to look out for.
Tip #1: Don’t be an ass-kisser
You write messages like:
Then I’ve got a gigantic tip for you:
Create a fake profile of an attractive woman and see what happens. I guarantee you; you’ll never send a standard ass-kissing-message again after this.
But before you waste your time with this, let me just tell you what’s going to happen: You’re going to get so f*cked up with this ass-kissing news that an asshole-ish message is a nice change of pace.
Women try to make men aware of this by simply ignoring these messages, but unfortunately, this hasn’t proved to be an effective educational measure.
Tip #2: Use her name
I guess our bro Dale is right. We, humans, are heavily conditioned to our first name. A baby doesn’t even know what words are, let alone what they mean. But he regularly hears a sound that’s used by others to get the baby’s attention.
And you can use this conditioning to your advantage by using her name in your messages. That way, she automatically feels more addressed, and your message is less generic.
This alone can be a sufficient icebreaker.
But I want you to be more than that.
Tip #3: Use clickbait
You’ve probably clicked on a YouTube video before and felt ashamed that you fell for the obtrusive thumbnail or extreme title.
Actually, you know beforehand that it’s a clickbait, but you still have to click on it.
You know beforehand that this video is a complete waste of time. Yet 6 million people couldn’t resist clicking on it. And neither could I.
Yeah, I clicked on it too. What can I say? I’m not proud of it.
But at least it reminded me of the power of clickbait.
It’s a great idea to ask you:
It’s a cheap trick, but hey, in the beginning, you just need her to respond.
All examples you’ll see now – some more, some less – make use of this clickbait principle.
5 Tested openers for you and your family
#1: The unpopular opinion
You can bet your life she’s probably never been hit up by a man like that before.
The idea is quite simple: Share an unpopular opinion with her. At best, it’s so unpopular that she can’t leave it unanswered.
Does it have to be your actual opinion?
Not at all.
I’m grateful to “Daddy Trump” for all the entertaining conversations he has given me.
By the way, this message is also ideal in case she suddenly stops responding.
Because it’s hard to leave this text unanswered.
This woman obviously reacted very positively to the message. That won’t always be the case, but that isn’t the point.
All your first text needs to do is get her to respond.
After that, you’re welcome to write something like:
#2: The curiosity trigger
I readily admit it: This text is unfair.
With it, you make use of one of the strongest human weaknesses – the weakness of being far too curious.
Are you already curious?
Isn’t it fantastic how well that works?
>> 145+ Must have date Questions to Vibe Deep into the Night.
But I’ll torture you no longer, here is the opener:
Once she has responded, you can take several paths.
Either you send her random, historical facts like:
Or you can start role-playing:
Or you admit it was a cheap trick to get her attention:
The last two-second messages, of course, make it easier to flirt with her afterward.
#3: The clickbait compliment
This opener also makes her curious.
Then you pay her a sincere, specific compliment – for example, that this elegant, feminine style of dress suits her very well.
The disadvantage: It’s, unfortunately, a bit of an ass-kisser (but still within limits).
The advantage: It’s direct, and she would be stupid if she didn’t expect a flirtatious conversation.
#4: Radical honesty
Teaching you this opener is a little risky.
Because you’re going to be way off base a lot of the time, sometimes women will resent you.
But sometimes they will respect you so much that you’re immediately interesting to them.
It works as follows:
You text her, “Can I be honest with you?” and then wait for her response. An answer is likely because your question (1) arouses curiosity, and (2) everyone appreciates honesty.
And then you formulate 1:1 the thought that you had when you searched her profile. Unfiltered, sincere, and shameless. No matter what the thought was!
What I’ve written here is even more positive. But it doesn’t have to be. It’s not about kissing her ass. It’s about being completely honest.
#5: 2 truths, 1 lie
I really want to free you from the illusion of thinking that when you’re texting a woman, you have to compliment her.
In fact, you stand out even more when you don’t.
An original and playful way to get a response and start an entertaining conversation is the game “2 truths, 1 lie”.
You text her three stories from your life, one of which is fiction, and let her guess which one it is.
This isn’t only fun, but you can also introduce the subject of sex casually.
It works like this:
Now you know 5 effective openers for online dating
But after 3-5 messages, you might be clueless again and don’t know what to write.
Do you think I’m going to let you walk into the whole online dating world all by yourself, bro?
No, of course, I’ll give you something:
My free Transformation Kit.
Consisting of my best dating advice. Plus a texting masterclass you will benefit from during your online dating endeavors.
Filled with copy-paste lines to keep the conversation flirty all the way to the date.
Dan de Ram