I can spot them even from a distance.
Pickup artists besieging the city like Orcs besiege Minas Tirith.
It doesn’t matter whether it’s in a club, bar, shopping center, on the streets or anywhere else. Call it an instinct, call it a sixth sense, call it experience or call it the all-seeing-eye of Sauron.
The fact is:
You do “pickup” -> I see you.
That’s why in this article we’re diving into:
- 5 pick up artist techniques that you should never use, unless you want to die in awkwardness
- Pickup artistry that actually works wonders with women
- How pick up can change your life
- The benefits of getting into PUA
- Much more….
It must be said that it is usually very easy to recognize pickup artists.
In fact, some of them do EVERYTHING to make it impossible to overlook them:
They wear ridiculous outfits (= peacocking), speak a strange language (HB10, Set, Target, Numberclose, AMOG, HD, LMR) and appeal to every woman who dares to enter their field of vision.
Usually, they use the same lines on every girl they meet.
Now you might be thinking:
I don’t teach men to dress like idiots and do magic tricks to get a woman. Yes, I love approaching women, flirting with them, and generously sharing my bed with them.
And yes, I constantly explore the psychology between men and women, and I have been helping men to realize the love life of their dreams for more almost a decade.
Does that automatically make me a pick up artist?
Okay, you know what? So be it. Then I am a pickup artist. Fuck it.
But if that’s the way it’s going to be, I at least want to protect my reputation.
I will not be put in the same pigeonhole as those wannabe Casanovas who lie to women, categorize them by their sexual market value, and share their nude pictures in secret Facebook groups.
Does that mean I’m holier than the Pope?
Of course not.
There are many things I do that are not quite noble. But even I am too good for the above situations.
In any case, Pickup (= art of seduction) does not have a good image.
It is partially justified.
But partially also wholly unjustified.
I have met many good men through the “Pickup Community.” I would bet on my unborn kids that they will make the world a better place — something I can’t say about many people.
This study even shows that “PUA is not just about teaching men to manipulate women, but used in the right way can be used to teach men and women to understand how we manipulate each other in the art of seduction.”
Not all pickup artists are monsters who sexually harass women for breakfast – as feminists, social justice warriors, and the media would have us believe.
In fact, I am firmly convinced that it would help women A LOT if EVERY man would practice pickup. In the proper way, of course.
There would be happier women.
And, who knows, maybe even world peace…
But what is the right way?
This is something I want you to take away from this article.
By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?
You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
5 Pick up Artist (PUA) Methods That are Too Dumb to Grasp
In this article, you will find some words you may never have heard before.
In general, we at AttractionGym stay faaaaar away from anything pick up/manipulation related. But (1) it’s a term people look up on Google, so I need an article about it.
And (2) those good ol’ days still have some valuable wisdom once you translate them to good flirting principles.
As an example. You’re allowed to laugh along with me:
Never before has any voice uttered the words of that tongue here on this blog.
I do not ask your pardon, for the Black Speech of Mordor may yet be heard in every corner of the West!
Oh, wait, I switched something up…
This is not the language of Mordor, but the one used by Pickup Artists.
It’s easy to confuse them.
Anyway, there is no reason to click this article away and watch a cat video on YouTube instead, just because you didn’t understand one of these strange words.
Because I’m going to explain them to you in a short, concise, and transparent way, so don’t panic.
Let’s start with the first odd term.
PUA term #1: Peacocking
Originally, “Peacock” is an animal you should have heard of.
And what is so special about a male peacock?
Right, he has super extravagant feathers that he uses to attract females.
Pickup Artists like that idea.
You don’t have to overcome your approach anxiety, you don’t have to take action, you don’t need an interesting personality, all you have to do is wear colorful, flashy clothes and the ladies will appear automatically…
However, they have forgotten that women are not peacocks.
Not every mating behavior from the animal kingdom can be transferred to humans.
There is a spider that dances to attract females.
Are we going to shake our hips every time we talk to a woman now?
And what about the male honey bee, which dies after reproduction because its “sex organ” gets stuck in the female bee and is ripped out of its body?
Are we supposed to imitate bees from now on as well?
I don’t think that would be a good idea.
You indeed stand out through peacocking, but not positively. You seem more like a man without a sense of fashion.
PUA term #2: Talking over your shoulder
Years ago, an American pick up artist came up with an idea:
The idea has poisoned the minds of thousands of men, although it has never worked for anyone.
Women won’t think:
It’s more like:
It is much easier to build sexual tension when you stand directly in front of the woman and look into her eyes.
Now, is this the only way to build sexual tension?
There are other ways you can make a girl horny. And you should learn them all.
Good thing I wrote a full article about it, check it out here:
PUA technique #3: Opinion Opener
Another term from Mordor… ehm… from the pickup community.
The idea is that you approach women by asking their opinion.
The classic example (if you hear this saying, you can be 100% sure that you are dealing with a pickup artist):
Why do so-called “Opinion Openers” not work?
It might surprise you, but women are not stupid.
Of course, she knows that you don’t care about her opinion, and that you actually want to seduce her.
Because women know that anyway, it’s better just to be honest. That shows you got balls of steel, which is something women can appreciate.
To save me from protest comments like:
But you did not seduce her BY your stupid question, but REGARDLESS of your stupid question. Know the difference.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t ask questions. But do it the right way.
If you need some inspiration, read this article here:
PUA term #4: Demonstrating high status
There is indeed is a hierarchy among men.
The higher up a man is within this hierarchy, the more attractive he is to women.
This is also the reason why it is considered an achievement if a man is attractive to many women.
That’s quite something. There is a lot to it like competence, courage, willpower, discipline, intelligence, humor, lightheartedness, and much, much more.
The higher your status is, the more women you will attract.
But what many pickup artists have not understood:
You can’t fake high status.
They have countless lines, stories, and tactics in their repertoire, which are intended to demonstrate high status.
One tactic, for example, is to verbally belittle a woman’s status so that one’s own status seems higher.
Sounds stupid, right?
Well, it is.
Friends, clients, and hungry interviewers often ask me what my secret is when it comes to women.
My response to this often consists of these three insights:
- You can’t fool women. They see right through you like Superman with his x-ray vision.
- If you’re honest with yourself, you don’t even want to fool women.
- To even think that you have to fool women to get them is idiotic enough.
What I’m trying to say is:
You can’t pretend you have high status by saying certain things.
Women can smell it.
Since the dawn of mankind, it has had fatal consequences if a woman mistakenly chose a loser.
And that is still the case today.
To this day, evolution has equipped women with an extremely sensitive status detector that immediately lights up red when it detects bullshit.
If you compulsively try to demonstrate high status, it is more likely to be an indicator of low status.
PUA technique #5: Thinking women make them happy
I’ve never told this story before.
At least not in that way.
During sunrise, I walked home. The night before, I didn’t have one, not two… but three one-night-stands.
All women were great.
When I got home and looked in the mirror, I didn’t like what I saw.
It was not an aesthetic problem. Considering that I haven’t slept a second, your remarkably modest bro looked amazingly handsome.
But I still didn’t like my reflection.
I felt dirty, lifeless, and lonely.
Suddenly, I realized that I was nothing more than a traumatized boy who had not experienced enough love from women as a teenager.
Sleeping with countless women was nothing more than my compensation strategy.
I used to think I’d leap for joy when I finally had women in my life…
And yet that morning, right after having an epic night with three different women, I stood there feeling like shit.
And many pickup artists have had similar experiences, have similar experiences, and will continue to have similar experiences.
They don’t realize that they’re actually running away from trauma. Instead, they distract themselves by seducing women.
The train of thought is here:
From experience, I can assure you:
It doesn’t work that way.
No woman will be able to give you what you’re looking for.
You have to build it up for yourself. Through sweat and blood.
How do you do that? By working on yourself and improving your life.
This will allow you to become more self-confident (= more attractive).
Here’s a full article on how to start improving your life right now:
5 Pickup Artist Techniques That Really Work
Technique #1: Pickup lines
How a cook learns recipes…
… a pick up artist learns pickup lines.
Since the main pillars of my teachings are authenticity and honesty, you may think I demonize canned sentences.
In my (accurate) opinion, prepared lines can even help to be more authentic.
Maybe you are often trapped in your own head with the screaming thought: “I don’t know what to say!!!!!”
And you end up saying something you don’t mean just for the sake of getting rid of the painful silence.
This problem can often (not always) be solved by memorizing a handful of useful sentences.
They can give you the necessary security and confidence in moments of panic so that your authentic personality has a chance to shine.
Technique #2: Routines
Many pickup artists rely on routines.
They may say precisely the same thing to one woman as to another.
Is that romantic?
But does that automatically mean that routines are the devil’s work?
Think about your morning routine, for example.
If you had to think about what to do next after brushing your teeth, the first hours of your day would be unnecessarily tedious.
Dating can be a hassle too… unless you have certain routines.
I know that all the women who read this will be disappointed now, but it is true:
90% of my first dates look almost identical.
I meet in the same park, go to the same bar, go back to the same park, and if both sides feel like it, I kiss her on the same park bench to then take her to the same Casa del Dano.
Whether she’s special, I can’t know yet. It’s the first date.
After all, that’s what a first date is all about:
Getting a feeling for the other person and getting comfortable with each other.
If both the first date and the woman were super bueno, I could still blow her away with a special second date.
But for the first meeting, I see no reason to make myself crazy, because I don’t know what to do with her.
If the man and the woman can relax, because the man has a precise plan that he can confidently propose and execute, you know what you get?
Right, a win-win situation.
More tips for successful first dates can be found here:
Technique #3: Having a wingman
A pick up artist is seldom seen alone.
He always has his wingman with him, a companion who helps him to seduce a woman.
Sure, you can go out alone, but having a GOOD wingman only has advantages:
- He can amuse her (overweight) friend or the rest of the group so that you can talk to your chosen one in private
- Rejections and failures are ten times as entertaining when you are together
- He can introduce you to women
- He can kick your ass when you hesitate
- You can give each other feedback
Technique #4: Mass approaching
When I ask our participants at the beginning of our coaching how many women they have approached in the last month, the answer is usually something between 0 and 5.
My opinion is radical but accurate:
That is far too little!
There are so many interesting conversations you’ll miss out on. So many adventures you are not going to enjoy. And so many great women who will never enrich your life.
A Pickup Artist approaches more women within a week than other men in their entire life.
Many overdo it, but it is a smart strategy.
Not only to meet an absolute dream woman at some point but also to overcome social anxieties.
If you suffer from social anxiety, it might be a good idea to start working on it as soon as possible.
No worries, though: You can overcome your fear of strangers.
Read this article to find out how:
Technique #5: Wearing a mask
There is this weird feeling you get when you talk to a pickup artist. It’s almost as if it is unclear if you are even talking to him or some fake version of him.
Again, authenticity is the #1 most important and attractive trait a man can have, which is why I put so much emphasis on it when I coach men.
Even if it seems like a paradox:
Wearing a mask can help you become more authentic.
This is what Bane had to say about it in the movie “The Dark Knight Rises”:
Many villains were initially ignored, mistreated and bullied. But the second they put on their mask…
They immediately received all the respect, attention, and authority they wanted.
There are countless examples. Think about:
- Darth Vader
- Jason (Friday the 13th)
- Scarecrow (Batman begins)
- Ghostface (The Scream)
- The Green Goblin (Spiderman)
Pick up artists often have a similar past. To avoid further pain, they put on a mask.
But I’m not talking about a physical mask. In the movies, it is necessary, and the more iconic and frightening the mask looks, the better.
But here in real life, I am more talking about some sort of fake persona we all act out from time to time. It can be quite subtle.
It can protect you, make you more inauthentic, but it can also potentially make you more influential than any physical mask ever could.
If you put on the RIGHT mask, women will hardly be able to resist you.
It doesn’t matter if you’re nobody right now. Or whether you have the personality of Jim Levenstein.
Many real-life examples have put on this greater-than-life mask:
- Jesus Christ
- Mahatma Gandhi
- Connor McGregor
- Muhammad Ali
These are just a few names, and I could name many more.
Yeah, it was their real personality. But they exaggerated it. Made it larger. Put it on steroids.
The reason why this works so well is that most people would never dare to do that.
Just the thought of being themselves scares the shit out of them.
Few dare to be themselves.
And even less dare to exaggerate their personality.
As crazy as it sounds, but men actually need to be taught how to be themselves. And that is precisely my job as a dating coach.
Society conditioned them to be afraid of being authentic to avoid rejection.
Low self-esteem, zero respect, and no women.
The good news:
Once you put on the mask, you won’t have any competition.
Not in your career.
Not in your personal life.
And certainly not with women.
Now you may be wondering how to wear the mask properly.
The answer is simple:
You take your personality and inject steroids into it. You’re overdoing it. The good AND the bad sides.
Do not copy another person’s mask, because that doesn’t work. There can only be one Joker, one Darth Vader, and one Dan de Ram.
Wear your own mask, because only you can wear it.
Bonus tip: Start dating more women right now
Great. You should have a better understanding of the Pickup Artist techniques by now.
Use the good techniques. Forget about the rest.
Now, you might want to take things to the next level to give a boost to your dating life.
In this case, I’ve got something really cool for you.
It’s a toolkit to start dating right away, with all the best tips for making yourself an attractive man.
- The best opening lines to get her hooked
- How to get out of the friendzone and be her lover
- Steal my lines for more entertaining conversations online and offline
- Step-by-step instructions for attracting women
- And much more…
You can find it all in my Transformation Kit.
Dan de Ram