It’s time to delve deeply into the ancient Greek philosophy…
Kidding. Not in the mood for that.
We have more important things to do: Educate you about platonic love, before you trust naive fairy tales and get yourself into shitty relationships with women.
If you clicked on this article, there’s probably a certain woman in your life right now. You’ve met her before and you had the feeling it was going well – until she suddenly tells you that she wants to keep the relationship between you purely platonic…
You’re confused… You think back to your history class, wonder what Plato has to do with all this and actually thought that you’re on the direct way to a wonderful romantic relationship…
How the fuck are you supposed to handle this new situation now?
Many men use platonic love as an excuse for not having to act masculine and lie to themselves.
We’re going to make sure today that you’re not one of those men.
Besides, you’ll find out
- Platonic love meaning: What exactly is meant by “platonic love”? The truth revealed
- 3 tips on how you should deal with platonic love in order not to lose your masculinity
- What is (platonic) love all about? How you can tell if a platonic relationship is right for you
- Platonic love vs romantic love: How to turn a platonic relationship into a “normal” relationship with physicality
- Much more insight into platonic love…
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Platonic love/ platonic relationship meaning: What is meant by it?
“Platonic love” means a love between two persons, which exists without sexual interests and only with the feeling of strong attachment to each other. A love without sexual fulfillment, a kind of kinship through a “purely spiritual” connection.
In other words, Platonic love describes a “loving chastity”.
The ancient Greek philosopher Plato described this as the highest form of love. For him this kind of affection was worth more than any physical desire.
Here one must distinguish whether chastity is voluntary or forced:
- It can happen when the woman doesn’t reciprocate the man’s feelings, but the man thinks he can win the woman over through persistence
- It can be physically caused, for example by male impotence
- Or one decides for religious or other reasons for a platonic relationship
I know, for example, a couple who’s married, have never had sex and aren’t planning to do it.
Why?
She has been raped several times in the past and associates sex with something negative. He really loves her and understands why they keep the relationship platonic.
Sounds quite difficult in theory. So let’s see how it looks in practice.
Can a platonic love between man and woman work?
If you look at studies on this topic, you’ll find that in most so-called “cross-sex-friendships” sexual attraction does play a role somehow. At least in one of them and more often in men.
In a study, 51% of the 318 participants stated that they had already had sex with their actually platonic partner.
Study director April Bleske-Rechek of the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire says:
I have to agree with her on that from personal experience:
If a man feels and behaves masculine and meets a woman who feels and behaves feminine, then the probability of sexual attraction is high.
This doesn’t automatically mean that one is also pursuing this sexual attraction and must necessarily live it out. After all, we aren’t drive-controlled rabbits.
One can be aware of this on both sides and then actively decide not to live out this sexuality with each other.
Passion and sexuality are elementary important elements of a relationship for me. Therefore a platonic love would never work for me and I would say the same for most other men.
However, the couple I spoke of earlier seems happy and they travel around the world together to collect epic memories.
So, it seems to work for some people.
>> Sexual Attraction – 15 Things She Wants You to Know, But Will Never Tell You.
The dangers of platonic love
There are many men in a friendship who pretend not to feel anything sexual for the woman, but secretly hope that they’ll somehow end up in bed with her.
The man then pretends to be her new best friend. They tell each other everything and constantly do something together.
The woman gives him cute nicknames, uses him as an emotional garbage can and treats him like her personal puppy.
This happens because in this situation the man simply doesn’t have the balls to show the woman his true (sexual) interest.
Instead, he hopes that the woman will eventually come to believe that he’s the right one for her.
In other words: The man is up to his ears in the friendzone.
His interest in women usually only shows at parties when he’s drunk.
The woman usually notices his deeper need, but often ignores or denies it because she enjoys the attention and validation she gets from him.
The result?
In this situation, the man doesn’t feel perceived as a sexual being and ultimately feels completely UNMANLY.
This feeling is simply humiliating – believe me, I speak from experience.
On the other hand, it can also happen that you first have a “normal” relationship with your girlfriend, but suddenly she wants to make it platonic.
In this case, the sexual attraction you previously had for her has gone down the drain and you should refresh your relationship.
Have you been able to recognize yourself anywhere? Then it’s time to go to cause studies.
3 tips to help you see whether platonic love is for you or not
#1: Be honest with yourself
Listen to yourself. If you’re in a platonic relationship with a woman right now, is it really because you chose to?
Do you only see her as a good friend and is it okay for you if she has sex with other men?
>> 9 Tips to Get and Keep a Casual Sex Relationship.
Or have you ever imagined what it would be like to have sex with her? Do you sometimes secretly look at her ass or at her lips and imagine kissing her?
In this case you have also boarded head over heels into the friendzone and it’s time for the following:
#2: Break out!
Now you should try to break out of the friendzone like the Beagle Boys.
But you don’t do that by suddenly making it clear to her that you would like to have sex with her or by writing her a love letter like in kindergarten.
Instead, you should gradually stop suppressing your sexual interest.
- Start by giving her lewd compliments
- Hug her a little longer than usual when you say hello or goodbye
- If she says something that impresses you, say something like, “Wow… you’re getting kind of interesting lately.”
Then pay close attention to her reaction. If she always responds well to your new behavior, you can become more direct and sexual with time.
To perfect your friendzone escape plan, you shouldn’t skip this:
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But what if she reacts badly to your advances and turns away from you? Then this can help:
#3: Radical openness
This can be painful but is the best solution in this case.
If you feel that you’ve been trying to escape from the friendzone long enough, then clear the air:
Ask her for an open conversation and let her know how you REALLY feel about her.
By the way, this is also true if you have already had sex but she suddenly wants to have a platonic relationship with you.
If you have told her everything you feel for her and even that doesn’t change anything for her, then distance yourself from her.
>> Get Out of the Friend Zone & Into Her Lover Zone – 13 Magic Moves.
It would only hurt you to continue your friendship with her. It would be one-sided, and you would have to constantly repress a part of yourself.
When is platonic love good for you?
In conclusion, one can say that a platonic love between man and woman is only something for you if you and the woman are both aware of your needs and appreciate them mutually.
Although it’s very rare, there are women who – even if they’re very much in love with a man – don’t feel any sexual interest for him.
If this is the case with you, you should definitely think together about the possibility of an open relationship in which one or both partners can get sexual satisfaction outside the relationship.
If that’s okay with both of you, this way you can have a platonic relationship with each other.
Nevertheless, remember to listen to yourself again and again, to see if you can handle it and not pretend to yourself.
You want to avoid that women want a platonic relationship with you by being sexually simply too attractive?
Then this is a must-have for you:
Take it easy,
Dan de Ram
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