You downloaded the Tinder app, but nothing happens… no matches, no superlikes, the women don’t respond or you just can’t get her to meet you. While Tinder is booming, you get more and more the feeling that it isn’t for you.
Sounds familiar? Then it’s time for a how to Tinder guide!
In this article you get:
- 3 simple hacks that instantly generate 10x more matches
- Tinder profile tips: The right profile text that triggers the curiosity of attractive women (including copy-paste examples)
- How to chat on Tinder: The formula for first Tinder texts to which women are guaranteed to respond
- The #1 mistakes and how you avoid them
- How you make sure that the woman finds you more and more fantastic, without having to reveal much about yourself
- How you get so many numbers that you have to think of a system for your contacts to keep track of them
- And many more Tinder tips for men…
By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?
You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
3 simple hacks that instantly generate 10x more matches
Let’s talk about you first. You don’t look like Quasimodo and you still can’t get any matches? I know that’s fucked up, because no matches mean:
No flirting, no dating and definitely no Tinder hookups.
But hey, enough lonely Netflix nights with a big tissue box! Today you’ll experience simple hacks that will take your Tinder career to new heights. Welcome to the world of pros!
What are the best Tinder pictures for your profile?
Of course, you know that your profile picture is important. You’re intelligent enough to admit to yourself that Tinder is a superficial platform. The first thing your future “Tinderella” sees of you is your main profile picture. Most women swipe at record speed and only look at your other pictures after you’re shown as a “match”.
These reasons make your main profile picture the deciding factor whether she gives you a red “X” or a green heart.
Of course, a good look is an advantage, but there are a few ways to hack the system so that you get more matches immediately.
Regarding this the successful dating portal “OkCupid” conducted an online study. They analyzed 7,000 pictures to find out what the most effective pictures had in common. The result may surprise you…
Smiling isn’t necessary
From a young age we were taught to smile whenever someone took a photo of us (say “CHEEEESE”…), but studies show that there’s a big difference between men and women in this respect.
With women, we men find these two things great:
- When she looks directly into the camera with a flirty face
- When she doesn’t look directly into the camera and smiles
Generally, men appreciate it when the woman looks directly into the camera. Psychologically, this is probably because we want to know exactly what the woman looks like. Without any artificial angles or other nonsense.
It’s different with men. Women find it very attractive when a man doesn’t look into the lens. Maybe that’s because it makes him seem more mysterious. A woman doesn’t want to know at first sight who you are and that catching a pike is your greatest achievement. The man remains such a mystery and they become curious.
The golden hour
The most successful profile pictures are bright. An orange glow emanates from them. Here‘s an example:
You can achieve this very specific brightness if you take your photo just after sunrise (about 06:00 A.M.) or before sunset (about 05:00 P.M.) when the sky is orange. There are Instagram filters that imitate exactly this time.
In the following graphic you can see two blue peaks, which are exactly at sunrise and sunset.
In general, a colorful photo is an absolute eye-catcher. Because women swipe so fast, they will stop at your picture and look at it closely for the simple reason that it breaks the standard color pattern!
The Solo Waist Up Pose
The men who get the most matches all make use of this composition. They’re alone in the picture and it’s either a close-up from the shoulders or they put their upper body on the picture as well.
Here are two good examples at a glance:
The focused badass look
We’ve already clarified earlier that it’s absolutely not necessary to smile. But how should you look? There’s a certain look that women find irresistible and I call it: The focused badass look
A psychological study shows that men who exude feelings of happiness through their facial expressions are sexually less attractive to women than men who embody feelings of pride. Here’s what it looks like:
You don’t have to be a model to get that look. In fact, I bet your face will look as focused during an exciting Call of Duty match as a surgeon performing a heart transplant. 😉
If you don’t know anything about CoD or surgery, then you will get the focused look of the following measures:
- Pinch your eyes together minimally
- Grit your teeth a little
- Look into the distance
This is the result:
Pro tip for all spectacle wearers among us:
Take a picture without glasses! This makes you look much more attractive. And not only research shows that. Our coach Patrick (a notorious wearer of glasses) did the experiment:
His picture without glasses achieved twice the number of matches.
The advantage: Since you probably can’t see shit without glasses and therefore have to squint your eyes, you automatically have the focused badass view.
Don’t move all pictures where you smile or are seen with other people into the trash! These can be perfect as second or third pictures. A smile still makes you likeable, but your main profile picture shouldn’t reveal this right away.
Pictures that lead to conversations
You’ll have noticed that a match and a conversation are two different things. But are there pictures that increase the chance that a match will also become a conversation? Yes.
Pictures where you do interesting things, holiday photos or pictures with animals make the women burning curious about the person behind them.
Special hobbies are topics of conversation. Special places are touching.
The right profile text that turns the curiosity trigger of the woman upside down
Online dating is marketing. And you need to sell yourself in a glutted market. That is an opportunity: To differentiate yourself and get other people to buy.
If you think that a random quote from a former president, philosopher or scientist makes you stand out from the crowd, you’re completely wrong.
But don’t worry. I’ve two tested profile texts for you that will set you apart from average Joe.
You can either be inspired by them or take them over 1:1 with my official permission!
Profile text #1: The Spooning Champion
That was the first thing a woman of mine saw when we both wiped each other to the right:
This makes two things immediately clear:
- I’ve a sense of humor and I’m not afraid to show it. As a result, the women don’t expect boring conversations they usually have on Tinder
- I’m creative. Women appreciate that and their interest is aroused.
With the slogan “Spooning is life”, I tease other men who use inspiring quotes in the hope that women will find them interesting because of that.
Whether you take this profile text as it’s or create your own is entirely up to you. The important thing is that you find something that you find funny yourself. Don’t take your description too seriously. Humor is a good tool here. It should be easy for women to react to it.
Profile text #2: Unleash positive emotions
Here you will tell a kind of story about yourself, which triggers positive feelings in others and allows a little insight into your extraordinary life.
Everything that makes you different from other men is in here.
My first sentence is pure emotion. It’s screaming out a positive outlook on life. Turns out people don’t make logical decisions. Especially when it comes to buying. If something that makes you feel good, you buy it. The same goes with online dating.
My second section shows duality.
Yin-yang. Man-woman. Strong-weak. There are two sides to everything in life. That’s what makes it so beautiful. Even for women. So they want a man with two sides.
No one wants a man who’s just sweet. Nobody wants a man who’s just dominant. A combination of both is ideal and therefore I give women in my text two extremes. On the one hand I’m one who embraces the whole world, but on the other hand I will always take the lead.
Just the mixture women dream of.
Everyone likes to read and travel, but it subcommunicates that you’re a daring traveler who’s also educated.
Finally, I make a call for action. I ask them to (take the lead), swiping to the right.
The Spotify song: A useless feature?
It’s not something you’ve to use, but hey, what kind of dating coach would I be if I hadn’t also experimented with it?
Behind this is a slightly newer feature that allows you to present your favorite song to the world of Tinder. If women can identify with it and think it’s great, there’s a good chance they’ll write to you.
I chose the main song from the Disney movie “Moana” (What woman doesn’t love Disney?). A quite sweet song, but of course no woman buys that it’s actually my favorite song and that’s a good thing.
The first text that makes you immediately interesting for women
The first text is the hardest of all. Many men struggle to come up with something creative that makes women respond.
But women have no other choice:
Sure, every man responds to a “Hey ;)” from an attractive woman, but as far as you’re concerned, here’s what I suggest:
Get up, go to your bathroom, look in the mirror and tell me if you see this:
If so → Welcome, Leo. I’m a big fan of your work. I’m glad you read my articles. How are you doing?
If no → Promise me now and here, high and holy, that from now on you will never again open a text conversation on this planet (or any other planet in our solar system) with a “Hey, how are you?” or something similar.
If you want to stand out with your first message, you must also write something that’s unique. It’s self-explanatory, right? Scan her pictures and profile text for possible inspiration and try to smell her personality (this only takes 10 to 20 seconds).
Women have a very distinctive “olfactory organ” and can smell immediately whether you’ve taken the time to look at her profile or whether you text this to every woman.
Write something individual that no one else would text her and you’ll be at the top of the Tinder race with your first sentence.
But how do you keep a text conversation interesting? How do you make her always answer? These are questions you might still be asking yourself. After all, you want to get her excited about you – so, that she’s dying to meet you.
The secret is to trigger emotions in her. Alternate between being playful, humorous, and dominant.
If she has to think and use her brain capacity for 1 or 2 minutes with each of your messages, you will be in her head longer than the other guys who ask brainless questions like “Where are you from?” or “What do you do?
The longer she thinks about you, the more remarkable you become to her. And if you’re the sole occupant of her thoughts for a long time, then you must be something special to her, mustn’t you?
In practice this looks like the following. I tease her with the words “Never give up” that are in her profile description:
It’s time to realize that Tinder is a form of entertainment. Women find it great when you seduce them. Her profile can help you with that:
A role-play is a magical way to keep a conversation playful and original. When a woman makes a comment on my spooning career, I get completely absorbed in the role. The result is an insider you can always fall back on.
It’s extremely attractive when you come across as creative and authentic. A standard opening message that she already knows all won’t cause an enthusiastic reaction on her part. An easy way to be unique is to include all individual things, such as a comment on her name:
The secret that makes women answer
If a woman is attractive, then most men automatically become needy. You know how women feel about neediness? Nothing. On the contrary: It annoys them.
One trick to make it clear that you’re not one of those needy men is to leave out all non-alphanumeric characters!
- Fewer smileys (only if it’s necessary to convey a specific message)
- No question marks behind a question sentence (This is grammatically incorrect? Who cares, as long as it sounds less needy)
- No exclamation marks (no “Great!” or “Wow!”)
This is how the 3 anti-need-hacks can look like in practice:
Side note #1:
As you can see, in this conversation I got her Instagram without asking for it. A lot of men puss out and say something like “Can I follow you on Instagram?” Don’t do that!
Emojis are of course not completely useless. But only use them if it’s necessary for the lady to understand the message.
Side note #2:
If in doubt, I’ve gotten into the habit of an Instagram or Facebook check. After all, you don’t want to stumble into the infamous Tinder trap, where the woman in her pictures looks like an elf queen, but in reality more like an orc.
Behind the phrase “found 1 pic i liked” there is a total lack of need. Many men use many exclamation marks and words like “really”. DON’T DO THAT. Think about what that says about you. Exactly that: I’m a needy guy who loves everything you say even though I don’t even know you.
And that you’re probably results-oriented and see it as an opportunity to finally get laid.
The secret that makes women respond is:
Just casually come across like it’s no big deal.
It’s advisable to continuously think about how you can make her smile and tease her. Compete with her in an arrogant but humorous way. This is much more fun and builds trust.
Don’t have any rational, informative conversations!!
Avoid these mistakes throughout the rest of your Tinder career and it will be more successful than those of your friends:
- Love everything she does. Just because she loves horses, that’s no reason to love horses too.
- Complimenting her on her looks. She knows she looks good. Trust me. Complimenting her on something she’s not so sure about works much better.
- See each of their questions as an opportunity to sell yourself. You’re not a brochure that shows how great a city is and what can be done there. For example, if she asks you what you do, don’t see it as an opportunity to blow out as much information about you as possible.
How to create a rollercoaster ride on Tinder that will turn her upside down
Have you ever wondered why women like watching movies that make them cry? Or why so many girls like assholes?
Everyone knows that women want to experience emotions. They react particularly strongly to extreme emotions.
But let me tell you a secret:
These emotions can be both positive and negative!
Think of a rollercoaster. A ride that’s all straight lines, no ups or downs, would be fucking boring, don’t you think? It’s the same with text conversation. If you can make her experience ups and downs, you’re a winner. The right winner’s mentality is:
After all, it isn’t called for nothing: Teasing is a sign of affection. My six-year-old cousin is a little master in the art of teasing, which leads to girls asking him for kisses. Women love men who are funny and at the same time a bit (but playfully) arrogant.
Feel invited to analyze another example. Here I teased a woman with the look of her sister (she was on the profile picture with her):
Let her invest more in you than in Tesla stocks
Most men have a mindset that allows them to shoot themselves in the leg. They try to convince the woman how cool they’re and that dating them is a great thing.
This isn’t how you should be having a conversation.
Here’s a better suggestion: Think of yourself as a customer who walks into a store to buy a television. It would be absolutely stupid to convince a TV to let you buy it. You’re the one who checks if the TV meets your requirements.
Be the buyer, not the seller.
You have to be impressed by TV and not the other way around.
Now the question “But how in God’s name am I supposed to do that?” must be buzzing around in your head. You can do that by doing something we call “qualifying.”
There are two simple options:
1) Ask her not only WHAT she does in her life, but also WHY she does it. Ask her not only WHAT she does for a living, but also WHY she chose this job.
2) Statements instead of questions: Instead of asking her what she does, you can formulate a statement. Example: “You look like someone who’s going to law school.”
Why it’s so important to let her invest in you
If you use these techniques, the conversation will revolve mainly around her. Every time she texts something about herself, she invests in the conversation and therefore in you.
It’s a well-known phenomenon that people find something more fantastic the more energy they put into it. This is probably a remnant of our hunter-gatherer ancestors. Energy was a precious commodity in those days, so you want to make sure that all that effort isn’t in vain.
Psychologists refer to this as cognitive dissonance.
People have a strong urge to rationalize energy investments. Your Tinder match will invent all kinds of reasons why it was a good idea to put a lot of energy into you. And eventually conclude that you were worth the investment. Which is ultimately the truth.
If you now combine qualifying and teasing, the whole thing becomes extremely effective. These techniques reinforce each other like Goku and Vegeta. When fused, this results in Gogeta, the Super-Saiyajin among the conversation techniques.
How you make a woman add YOU to WhatsApp and send the first text
If you’ve followed the above steps, your Tinder is certainly already full of great conversations and your friends are comparing your pimp level with Snoop Dogg’s. But there is a danger that for the hot ladies you’re just a Tinder buddy.
Great conversations, but no dating.
I’d rather be her affair than her Tinder text buddy. With conviction.
Your goal should be to move the conversation from Tinder to WhatsApp as soon as possible. That way, you’ll be much closer to a real date.
On Tinder, she texts mainly with needy guys, on WhatsApp she texts mainly with friends and family. That’s how you become a real person to her.
With the mindset of an officer, it’s easy to continue the conversation on WhatsApp. Instead of asking for her number, you can give her yours and tell her to text you.
That seems more confident and masculine than begging for the number like most people, don’t you think?
If you’ve followed the steps described in this article, your Tinder match will feel so much attraction to you that she will continue the conversation on WhatsApp!
With these tips, your dreams of wild Tinder adventures will finally come true. Turn a lonely Netflix evening into a “Netflix & Chill par excellence”.
You’re still not achieving the success you hope for?
No problemo, just “swipe” to these tips to improve your success IMMEDIATELY:
Dan de Ram