What Makes Women Attracted to Men? 11 Irresistible Qualities

When you ask men what makes a woman attractive, the answer is usually crystal clear: a beautiful face, a fine gluteus buttimus, curves, long legs, low body fat, etc.

Oh yes! And a sweet personality… of course…

Well, what happens when you ask women what they find attractive in men?

It usually gets really f*cking complicated, my friend.

So sit up straight, strap yourself in and hold on tight. We are entering the mysterious world of women!

What you get:

  • Exactly what makes women attracted to men, 11 qualities
  • How to behave like a REAL man
  • Example sentences to make her attracted
  • A subtle form of eye contact that gives her butterflies
  • Peculiar qualities that are attractive to women, because… well… women…
  • Much more…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

The fundamentals of attraction in female psychology

Men usually react very strongly to optical stimuli. That’s just the way it is.

To deny it leads to suffering. To accept it leads to tuning into your natural, male sexuality.

Don’t ever let anyone judge you for being reasonably superficial. Who decided it’s wrong to want a good-looking woman?

I could also walk around pointing fingers and condemning women for paying too much attention to a man’s behavior, but last time I checked I already passed my glory kindergarten days.

Anyway, now you know women are attracted strongly to behavioral cues.

What does that mean? Two things:

  1. Every man – no matter what he looks like – has the potential to be attractive to women
  2. Working on your personality and behavior is the best investment you can make

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take care of yourself and look like Jabba the Hutt…

Appearance does help – and what’s more, it indicates good character traits.

I can tell you what doesn’t help, though:

Thinking you ONLY have to look good and boom – you attract women like light attracts moths.

What makes women attracted to men – Top 11 qualities

Quality #1: How to be a real man

There is one trait that turns out to be attractive as fuuuck.

I once analyzed what ten of my friends, who get the most women, have in common.

Of course they all have their own wicked ways of talking to ladies, but there is one thing they ALL do:


Exactly what do I mean by that?

They don’t do things just because the girl wants them to. They dance to their own music.

You will NEVER see them chasing women like a lapdog and they certainly don’t wait for a woman to come and talk to them.

They approach them proactively.

A real man takes the lead.

And since I repeated it twice by now, you hopefully understand how important it is.

So if you like a woman, don’t just wait for something to happen. Be active, take the reins and pursue what you desire.

Leadership helps you have a more masculine edge to your personality and therefore be more attractive.

Of course, there are other ways to be more masculine.

Most women are attracted to strong men, so you should know how to become one.

I wrote an article on how to increase your masculinity, check it out:

>> 7 Ways to Get a More Masculine Edge (to Balance the Feminine)

Quality #2: Don’t forget THIS under any circumstances

Now you know it’s attractive to take the lead. What else is?

Let’s look at the top 10 of my most badass friends again.

Whatever they do, be it at work, in their free time or with women, they have a hell lot of FUN.

They remind me a bit of Baloo the bear, because even if they get rejected, they keep up their bloody good mood.

How do they do that?

By making FUN their mantra.

When we go out together, we are constantly laughing, joking, challenging each other and doing things others would call crazy.

We don’t shy away from being absolutely ridiculous, and thus we leave a lasting impression on all the people we meet.

A story:

During coaching one of our clients was totally intimidated by a woman standing in front of a bar. I can somewhat understand him. After all she looked STUNNING.

Beautiful face, extravagant dress and aristocratic vibes.

I gave him instructions on how to approach her, but he was too nervous and could not pull himself together.

So I said:

“Hey, no problem, bro. Let’s just bounce instead.”

I then started bouncing with no music around, pretending to be in the front row of an Eminem concert.

He decided to join and funnily enough four strangers joined as well.

So there was a group of 6 men bouncing, jumping, dancing and having fun.

Suddenly I said to my student:

“Stop! Approach her now.”

It was no surprise to me that he suddenly had zero problems walking up to that girl.

You wanna know what happened next?


Just kidding –  he killed it of course. The girl gave him a very warm welcome:

“Oh, you are one of those funny guys who were dancing over there! I thought that was really cool.”

He got her number and a week later they met up to go on a date.

My point?

Have fun. As much as you can. For the rest of your life. Women are attracted to that.

Let’s dive deeper into what makes women attracted to men.

Quality #3: This may surprise you a little

Maybe you were also raised mainly by your mom. The only thing you usually learn about the art of seduction from mothers is:

“Always be nice to her, don’t disagree with her and make sure to be a gentleman.”

As a result most men say what women want to hear and avoid any confrontation.

So when you state your truth, you already stand out from the crowd as much as Arnold Schwarzenegger.

90% of conversations women usually have with men are not challenging at all.

But women love challenges.

Being challenging makes you interesting and attractive.


That does not mean you should constantly be negative.

It means you should own your opinion, not shy away from disagreeing with her and/or playfully tease her for her opinion.

 “But Dan, I have no idea how to properly tease a girl… Last time I tried she didn’t seem to like it at all.”

I got you, man. Teasing is an art. And it can be tricky at first.

Trust me though: Teasing is a skill you can learn. And guess what?

I wrote an entire article about this! Read it here:

>> How to Tease Women – 7 Ways She Actually Likes + 11 Examples

I’m getting in the flow with these attractive qualities. Time for the next attraction switch.

Quality #4: A deep voice

Women melt when they hear a deep voice.

A deep voice signals masculinity, determination and authority.

Imagine a bouncer with the voice of a ten-year-old girl refusing to let you enter the club…

How seriously would you take him?

To stick with the bouncer example: If you have a deep voice, a woman will let you enter her club with pleasure, if you know what I mean.

Watch this video of the 10 actors with the most impressive voices:

What is noticeable?

Every single one of them, without exception, has a…?! Right! Deep voice. It almost sounds like they can grate cheese with their vocal cords.

If you have a high voice, don’t worry. You can make up a lot by the right intonation. Go down with your voice especially at the end of your sentences (yes, even with questions). This way every sentence you say has the necessary power.

(For the nerds: HERE you can read more about the interesting science of having a deep voice.)

The next thing that makes women attracted to men might sound familiar to you. But there’s a twist.

Quality #5: A healthy physique

This quality is the reason you should get your ass up if you haven’t taken it seriously yet.

Women are programmed to be attracted to a fit partner.

It makes sense historically. Times weren’t always as safe as they are today.

Of course a woman feels safer when well-protected.

Sure, it is less important to be as strong as a bear these days. However, even in modern times there are challenges a man has to overcome. And he usually has easier times overcoming shit when he doesn’t die when he climbs some stairs.

Low body fat is associated with a healthy lifestyle and discipline. It doesn’t matter how fair this association is. Just don’t be surprised that women are irresistibly attracted to Channing Tatum.

So eat healthy, exercise and stay on that path. You will not only get more attention from women, your whole quality of life will increase.

Ready for the next quality women find attractive?

Quality #6: Facial hair

It’s no secret that most women aren’t attracted to soyboys.

One indicator of manliness is:

A proud beard.

It signals that you have already passed puberty, are sexually mature and are ready for a woman who will surrender to you – and your beard.

But how long should your beard be?

A study conducted by the University of Queensland in Australia shows that women find clean-shaven faces and long beards the least attractive.

Men with light to strong stubble were rated best.

So grow a beard, but also buy a trimmer so you can keep it in check. You don’t want to look like the man in the picture above.

You can’t grow a beard? Don’t worry. It’s not the end of the world.

Our veteran coach Mathijs has cheeks as smooth as a baby’s butt, but he is bathing in love and affection from women every morning.

By the way, if you’re a bit younger and beardless so far, it may still come. My facial hair started appearing when I was 23, so there is definitely hope even for you.

What attractive quality is up next you might think?

Quality #7: The V-Shape

Even more than the length of your third leg, the shape of your back can make women around the globe crazy about you.

Let’s look at a survey:

63% of women like broad shoulders in men. According to this survey a six-pack is not a must, although 40% of women dream of it.

Wide shoulders combined with a slim waist create the infamous V-shape that half the women want!

Seduction is pretty damn easy, right? You just need a gym membership, some discipline and soon you’ll be swimming in pussy juice, right?


Even though a fit body helps, it is not as simple as that.

Women won’t suddenly think you are a great catch simply because you carry some extra muscle mass around.

And, unfortunately, you won’t turn into a fitness model overnight. Achieving such a physique takes years of training and strict dieting (and usually some doping, but that’s another topic).

Is it really worth the effort?

That’s a question only you can answer for yourself.

All I want you to understand is that you don’t need to go to the gym every day just to be attractive to women.

Maybe it is a good idea for you to instead invest some of that time in reading books, joining workshops, talking to women, going on dates etc.

Quality #8: Speak slowly

We already spoke about a deep voice and its potential to make women go nuts.

You can also use your voice in another way if you want it to become a secret weapon of mass seduction:

By speaking slowly.

This has many advantages.

One of them is that you have more time to think about what you actually want to say. I often teach my clients to wait for 3 seconds before answering a woman’s question.

This way you avoid saying impulsive things you don’t really mean. It teaches you to think more sharply and make better decisions in your choice of words.

Not only that…

The #1 reason why I can absolutely recommend talking slowly is:

You seem and become calmer.

A person who speaks quickly often comes across as nervous. A person who speaks slowly comes across as relaxed.

So speak slowly and women will be attracted to you instantly.

What else makes women attracted?

Quality #9: Move casually

Suppose you’re in a club. Your mission: seducing a beautiful woman.

How do you move?

By jumping around like a little Chihuahua on ecstasy and barking until someone takes you home out of pity?

I don’t think so.

That shouldn’t be your plan A and, by the way, not your plan B either.

Men who are very popular usually have a very relaxed and calm manner.

A good example is George Clooney in his role in Ocean’s 11:

Pay attention to his body language. Does he move a lot or a little?

You realize that he is as calm as a rock. And it’s no secret that women find this old bastard totally hot.

If you move calmly, women associate that attribute with inner peace, balance, self-confidence and strength. All the attributes that make a woman attracted to you

Quality #10: The right eye contact

Eye contact is something most people are not comfortable with.

However, if you want to seduce a woman, you will have to look into her eyes sooner rather than later.

That’s how you show her that you’re confident and authentic. She can see in your eyes how much you mean the things you say.

So practice looking into women’s eyes in a calm and controlled way.

You can say a lot with your eyes alone. And the same goes for women.

Women sometimes look at you in a way that doesn’t leave space for interpretation. In other words: She wants you. Right now. 

But can you read eye contact to know a if girl’s interested in you?

I covered the whole topic in an article, so I suggest you check it out:

>> Reading Eye Contact: 7 Signals She WANTS You

Quality #11: Strength

Women want a strong man, mentally AND physically would be ideal.

They want a man who can pick them up, hold them and carry them around easily.

I wish the truth was less brutal, but weak men are, in their eyes, only good enough for carrying their bag, buying them drinks and taking care of their emotional problems.

She doesn’t respect them and we don’t even have to talk about her sexual desire towards them.

She wants a strong man who will make her heart beat faster. A man who knows how to satisfy her both emotionally and physically, without allowing anyone to treat him like a doormat, has a higher addiction potential for a woman than crystal meth.

Should you be a criminal, murderer, macho guy now?


What women are attracted to is a man who can be strong and gentle at the same time.

Since women are usually physically inferior, they need to make sure they are in good hands. Therefore, she specifically looks for behavioral patterns that indicate gentleness.

So have a smile on your face and use your inner calmness and thoughtfulness to make clear that you are no danger to her.

Just think of yourself as a lion that is only tamed in her presence, but can get dangerous when necessary.

The Truth

If this is your first experience with the art of seduction, then perhaps some of the above points are somewhat shocking to you.

If you still live in a fantasy world where women don’t like sex, then it’s time to wake the fuck up.

There are a lot of women who crave passionate sex. Unfortunately, there are only few men who can help them in this regard.

Society makes men believe they should not be too demanding, reserved and nice. That every man should be kind, never disagree, give compliments all day long and provide flowers and chocolate…

At the same time men who openly show that they find women sexy are judged. “How dare you find a woman hot, you sexist, perverted asshole!”

Men started treating women as softly as if they were made out of glass.

Women tell you that unlike their female friends they would never have one-night-stands and prefer taking things slowly…

And yet it happens that they end up texting a player at night (me for example)…

Strange, isn’t it?

Something doesn’t quite add up.

So what makes women attracted to that secretly?

To be fair, women have it hard too. The truth is women cannot express what they really want due to social pressure. They will quickly be labeled as “sluts”.

  • They don’t tell you that every now and then they feel like sleeping with a guy at the first meet up or enjoy doing kinky shit on the dance floor.
  • They don’t tell you that they had more guys in bed than you had women.
  • They don’t tell you that they like being grabbed, bent over and f*cked…

But all these desires are in her and if someone knows her secrets and plays with them, they love it.

Be the one who is not afraid to take the lead and show her that she is safe with you. As a result she is able to go all out and finally drop this politically correct shield.

Now you know exactly what makes women attracted to men…

Which means you just went through the first step of getting better with women. Congratulations.

Let’s embark on the second step now: Becoming an attractive man.

How do you do that? I’m afraid you can’t, sorry.

Just kidding! I’ve got some great news for you:

I created a toolkit to start dating right away.

It includes all of the best tips for making yourself an attractive man.

You get:

  • Step-by-step instructions for attracting women
  • The best opening lines to get her hooked
  • How to escape the friendzone
  • Examples of witty lines to help you keep the conversation flowing
  • And much more…

You can find it all in my Transformation Kit. Download it here, it’s free!


Your Bro,
Dan de Ram

Stop awkward conversations
and painful rejections

My free Transformation Kit will make you irresistible to women.

  • 12 Opening Lines that Actually Work
  • 5 Date Generating Texting Tips (Plus Copy-Paste Lines for Tinder)
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